# Captivate ANY Audience and Use Public Speaking to Grow Your Brand (w/ Jen Gottlieb)

## Метаданные

- **Канал:** Gillian Perkins
- **YouTube:** https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqaclIlKr1M
- **Дата:** 12.05.2026
- **Длительность:** 39:06
- **Просмотры:** 540
- **Источник:** https://ekstraktznaniy.ru/video/50995

## Описание

Public speaking and personal branding are becoming more important than ever. In this video, I sit down with Jen Gottlieb to talk about how to build visibility, grow your audience, and become a more confident communicator. Jen shares practical advice for getting speaking opportunities, crafting compelling keynote speeches, improving your storytelling skills, and overcoming the fear of being seen online and on stage.

We also talk about why human connection matters even more in the age of AI, the mistakes most speakers make, and how entrepreneurs can use both social media and public speaking to build trust and authority. Whether you want to speak on physical stages or simply become more confident showing up online, this conversation will help you communicate your message more effectively.

TIMESTAMPS
00:00 Why visibility matters for business growth
01:15 Jen Gottlieb’s business model and Stage Leaders program
03:02 How Jen got started in public speaking
07:49 Why everyone is already “on 

## Транскрипт

### Why visibility matters for business growth []

To grow your brand or business online, you have to first be seen by the right people. The people who will want to follow you or who want to buy products from you. But how do you get that visibility that is so essential? Well, today on the podcast, we're going to be hearing from Jen Gotautle, who will help us figure that out. Jen Gotautle is a powerhouse speaker and the best-selling author of the book Be Seen. And Jen's whole mission is all around helping entrepreneurs figure out how to get the visibility and have the courage to be seen so that they can grow their businesses and brands online. In today's episode, Jen will be giving us some practical and tactical information about how we can get on stages and how to use those stages to grow our brands, including some of her best tips for how to be a really engaging and interesting public speaker. But the practical and tactical is only part of it because we are only going to be able to use this information if we have the courage to step out and be seen. Whether that is stepping out on a physical stage or just on the stage of social media. So Jen is going to be sharing some truly brilliant advice for us on how we can find that courage for ourselves. Hey Jen, welcome to Work Less Earn More. It is great to have you here today.

### Jen Gottlieb’s business model and Stage Leaders program [1:15]

— Hi Gillian. I'm so excited to be here. So, let's start out by just talking a tiny bit about your business. I'm curious what it looks like today. Do you coach clients one-on-one? Do you sell digital products? What's like the Gen business model? The Gen business model has several different prongs to it. And it's always in some form of pivot and transformation. We don't ever really stay doing just one thing. But right now, my main offer, my main program that I do is called Stage Leaders. And that is an inerson and virtual hybrid 8week. I guess you could call it an experience. It's definitely not a course. It is an 8week container where I take mostly women, but we do have some guys in there. So, anyone that wants to become a really powerful stage leader, which is not just a public speaker, but anyone that wants to command stages and use stages as like the top of their marketing funnel to create more credibility and authority and become confident as hell on stage and communicate your message. We teach them how to create keynotes, how to build their speaker brand or their leader brand if they want to be a thought leader in anything very specific. And then at the end, we have a big event in person where everybody gets together and we get amazing footage on stage. And it's this 8week experience which is turning into this really beautiful community. And then there's an offshoot of it that is called Stage Leader Studio. And that is a membership that I have people with me throughout the entire year. So that's the main offer that I have. We also have a mastermind. We also do small in-person group events like 10 people that are called influencer intensives where we focus on social media. And then I'm also an investor in several different companies. I'm on the board of some companies. I'm a consultant and I speak all over the world and that's probably my favorite thing to do. I absolutely love doing one to many speaking. But yeah, — very cool. So, how did you get into the

### How Jen got started in public speaking [3:02]

public speaking game and into teaching people about public speaking and getting on stages? I've been speaking on stages since I was like four because I was an actress when I was a very little girl. I was a working actor as a little kid. Did musical theater my entire life, went to college for musical theater, studied theater. I actually dropped out of college and then moved to New York City. And so I was a working actor and I always thought that I was going to be an actress. I thought that's my purpose. That's what I'm doing. I'm going to audition my little face off for my whole life. I'm going to have to wait tables and I'm just going to play this acting game. And that was the vision that I had for my life. There was nothing else that I could possibly see. I had to be on stages performing. I had no idea that there was this thing called keynote speaking. I like didn't even know that it existed. Then I met my husband Chris Winfield and he when I met him, he was hosting these events. They were called Unfair Advantage Live and he would speak on stage and it would just be him for three days and he would teach entrepreneurs how to connect with the media. It was this very interactive conference experience and I'd never seen anything like it. I got into this whole world of wo people like get up on stage and they speak as themselves. This is wild and mind-blowing to me. And at that time, I had pivoted slightly from acting and I had this personal training company and I knew in my gut that wasn't it for me. I knew like I saw my husband or my boyfriend at the time speaking on these stages and I was like, "Wait a second, he's like doing the thing that I want to do. I could do that. I've been doing this my whole life just in such a different way. " So, I started to go to all these events with him. We started working together and we came to the conclusion that we were going to become partners in business and we started doing these unfair advantage live events together. And this was my first time ever getting on stage and speaking as myself. And I call this like my speaker boot camp because it was a really safe space for me to practice because we were hosting our own events. But I was like, I was really bad like terrible. I look at some of these videos from me at these events for this program that my husband like my boyfriend allowed me to be a part of basically and I was just a hot mess. But there was so much repetition and I just kept challenging myself to get on stage and do a new keynote and sell from stage and I was learning so so quickly. And then out of that event we actually birthed a PR agency because we were teaching people how to do PR and people kept coming to us and they're like can you do it for us? So when we birthed this PR agency, we needed a really great marketing funnel. And we decided that the top of the funnel was going to be me going out and speaking at all these different masterminds where our ideal clients were. And so I started going out on the road and speaking, not getting paid a speaker fee, but speaking in front of our ideal clients and getting people to sign up as a result of me speaking. So my keynotes then were way different from what they are now. They were me like talking about PR and teaching very tactical tools. But that was where I really got my speaker feet wet and where I really learned the craft. And then as I continued to speak all over the place, my keynote evolved into what it is now, which is very story- based and I get paid a fee now and I speak at all different types of events all over the world and we still host events but not unfair advantage live anymore. All different kinds. So, it's been an evolution, but it started really back when I was an actress. And it's so funny now because I stand on stage doing this thing that I always knew I was going to do. I always knew that my purpose was supposed to be on a stage, but I had absolutely no idea that it was going to be this type of performing. — And when I look at it now, I'm like, wow. You know, they say — sometimes it's this the thing that you want or sometimes it's so much better. And I had no idea that it was going to be this, but it's so much better than I could have ever imagined because now I don't have to wait for someone to pick me at an audition. I don't have to say somebody else's lines and I actually get to help people and I get to be myself while doing it. It's the coolest thing ever. So, does your business today does it mostly focus on helping people to become better speakers and to be confident on stage and to put together their keynote speeches and things like that? or do you just as much help people actually get on the stage? And if so, how do you do that part of the work? — All of the above. — Okay. — Uh I take them through the entire process of building their keynote, creating their messaging, getting all of their I call it stage essentials, stage essentials ready. So all of the marketing materials that they need, all of the messaging aspects that they need in order to get in front of people. And then I teach them strategies to go out and book. And I also bring in a lot of experts, agents, um, heads of bureaus and other really high like high level speakers to come in and possibly give them opportunities, talk to them, answer their questions. So we go through pretty much every aspect of the world of speaking from creating the keynote and the messaging all the way to booking the stage.

### Why everyone is already “on a stage” online [7:49]

stage. — So I'm guessing that right now the listeners are kind of in one of two camps. either they know that they are interested in speaking on a stage so they are like here for this conversation or else they're like actually I think I'm going to go listen to something else because I have no interest in being on a stage. I'm curious your thoughts on that. Those people who don't think they want to be on a stage, would you just say, "Yep, it's not for everybody. " Or would you do you have something to say to them? You know, like do you think that actually they maybe do want to be on a stage and they don't know it? Well, I think everybody's on a stage today whether they like it or not. So, you absolutely do not have to raise your hand and say, "Oh, I want to go speak at a gigantic conference. Uh, you don't definitely don't have to do that. " But I will say that if your listeners are entrepreneurs or somebody that's marketing a service, a product or story and you are using social media to do that, which is the thing that most people are using to do that right now because that's where everybody's attention is, that's a stage in our pocket. So every single person is technically on a stage every day or needs to be. I used to say you can have a personal brand or not. It doesn't really matter. Like do whatever you want. Do you. If you don't want to have a personal brand online, that's totally okay. I've changed my opinion on that. I would say in 2026 and beyond, you absolutely must 100% have some kind of virtual presence. And if you are a business owner or an entrepreneur or you have a s a story or something that you want to get out there into the world, it is a non-negotiable for you to have some kind of personal brand online. So that's a stage. You have to know how to communicate your message. tell stories. You have to know how to speak publicly. And all of my public speaking now is practiced with this stage in my pocket. I go live every day, every morning when I put my makeup on. I've been doing it for about four years. And I practice storytelling. I practice answering questions because my skill set is all about how I communicate. And I do not treat this live any differently than I treat an actual stage when I'm in a room with thousands of people because it's still the same pretty much amount of people that are watching and paying attention to me. It's just through technology. So if you're sitting here and you're thinking, well, yeah, I definitely don't want to be a speaker. I want you to listen to this conversation in a different way because everything that I'm saying actually does resonate with where we're going in the world and where we are right now as far as how we're building I call it audience equity which is basically an asset in today's world your audience is leverage. So whether you're building that audience from going to conferences and speaking in front of them in real life or you're building that audience speaking to people through this phone and creating content for them or you're building your audience speaking on a podcast just like this and speaking to them in their ears. However you're doing it, you are on a stage communicating to people and needing to get their buy in and their trust. So listen to it in that way.

### Why personal branding matters in 2026 [10:34]

— What makes you say that everyone should have a personal brand? I'm curious if you actually mean everyone and specifically two situations. One is do you also mean people who don't even have a business? Do you think they should have a personal brand? And then also somebody who has a business and it's not a personal brand. It's a brand that's separate from themsel. You think, I'm guessing, that they should also build a personal brand. What is the main reason that you think that? Yeah, your personal brand is your reputation. So, think about it this way. Let's talk about the person that does not have a business. They're just maybe either working a 9 toive job or whatever they're doing. Let's say this is something that we can relate to here. Maybe, possibly. I don't know. I don't relate to it now, but I did back in the day. If I was dating today and I someone introduced me to some guy and I went online and I tried to search them and they had no virtual footprint Facebook or no Instagram and nothing that I could see online, no LinkedIn, no nothing, I would not go on a date with that person. I don't know about you, would you? — Not if I didn't have a strong like I don't know knew a lot of people who knew them or something. You know what I mean? Like I would need a strong recommendation — strong recommendation. And so you never know what you're going to be doing with your life. Whether you don't have a job right now or you're working for a 9 to5 now, every single corporation, I mean, I own a company. So when I'm hiring people for my company, I'm looking at LinkedIn, I'm looking at Instagram, I'm looking at Facebook, I'm googling them, and I want to see a strong digital footprint. essentially their virtual resume, which is your personal brand, your reputation, the footprint that you're leaving on the internet for people to see. Who are you? And today in the world, the first thing that everybody does when they hear about someone or they meet someone new, I mean, my friend was just at a doctor and she went for her second appointment and the doctor walks into the room and he goes, "I googled you. " And she was like, "Oh my god, she's very successful, very, very successful woman and kind of a well-known woman. " And so, everyone's googling everybody else. And you want to have that digital footprint. I'm actually seeing now parents are building out social media uh accounts for their child athletes because now the colleges are looking at the social media accounts for the kids, the lacrosse players and the young football hockey players. When they're thinking about getting into colleges, they now need to have these personal brands showcasing them playing their sport. Uh same thing is going on for actors. Actors are getting hired not because they're the most talented, but because they have the best footprint online, the most followers, the biggest audience. Let's say you're a stay at home mom now and you don't want to build a personal brand or have anything to do with the internet at all. That's totally fine. Except maybe one day you do want to start a business. go get a job and you're going to want to have that leverage. If you already have an audience because people were following you because you were talking about stay-at-home mom stuff, which is amazing. There are so many incredible mom brands out there. then you're already going to have people that are listening to you. So if you ever start a business, that's leverage. Like somebody with an audience has an asset. Like for instance, you have a lot of wonderful people that are listening to this podcast. You have an asset which is people paying attention to you. If you decided tomorrow that you wanted to start a totally new company, let's say you really wanted to start making water bottles and you had this genius idea to make water bottles, you would have an audience of people that would already be your water bottle buyers because they've been listening to you and they know, like, and trust you. I I'm laughing at you grabbing the water bottle because I always do that, too. It's like, what is on my desk? It's like I've got a mouse, I've got a water bottle, and there's a camera there, right? So, I always grab these things as examples of

### Why public speaking is becoming more valuable in the AI era [14:07]

products. So let's talk now about the stage like the physical stage versus the stage in our pockets social media. What are your thoughts on whether like how these things compare and whether we today should be striving to get on the stage and working towards that like a physical stage and do public speaking that way or do you think that we get most of the same benefits from social media? I don't think you get the same benefits from social media. It's definitely a different experience when you're speaking in front of people in person. It's definitely more challenging for most people. I think the number one biggest fear in the world is public speaking or the number two. It's like death in public speaking. — I think that if you can become, especially in today's world, a powerful public speaker, you will have an unfair advantage over most of the people in the world today because most people can't even pick up the phone and have a conversation anymore. Everyone's just texting. And now that AI is here and AI is not going anywhere and AI is moving faster and faster than ever before, we're not going to need to communicate with each other anymore. So people are going to become really crappy communicators, but we're still going to crave human connection. And the more that AI takes over, I believe, the more people are going to crave going to conferences and being in person together and learning from thought leaders that are in front of them because now we don't know what's real and what's not on social media. I scroll by so many AI influencers every day where I'm like, "Oh, she's cute and she's spitting some truth. " I'm like, "Oh, she's not real. " And [clears throat] nobody knows that either. And it's going to become totally normal to not know who we're actually listening to, if it's a person or if it's AI. But you know that if you go to a conference, those people that are standing in front of you on the stage, those people are real and you're having an actual real moment of connection with those people. And I think that those who can speak are going to be able to blow past people who can't because they're going to have many more opportunities to have deep connection with their audience. And think about it for a second. Um as a consumer or this is the analogy that I like to use often when you're speaking on a stage. You have let's just say let's say there's a hundred people in the room. You have a hundred people that are there that chose to be there. They signed up. They said I want to be in this room. They walked in. They sat down. Maybe they bought a ticket, but they got themselves there. So, they're paying attention and they want to listen to you. You have a microphone in your hand. So, you have been anointed as the person that is the credible expert in the room. So, not only do they want to be there and listen to you, but you are also now in their eyes the expert and they are looking at you as the credible person because you have been chosen to be on the stage. Then you have their attention for an hour, 30 minutes. When you're on social media, you have people's attention for about three seconds before they swipe by. So, I believe that for my business, my greatest marketing tool is the fact that I can get up in front of an audience and speak to them for an hour and move them and give them an experience because those people that are in that room are going to remember me and be ride-or- die fans and followers and like we're going to have this deep connection that I don't think I could have possibly built with them on social media with one reel. I think that an audience in person of a hundred people of my ideal clients is more valuable to me than one of my viral reels that has three million views. — I just think that those people are going to look at me differently because I'm going to have given them an experience that changed their life. Hopefully, if I'm good and then also if I do my speech properly, then they become leads that can, you know, be in my world forever and they're always going to remember that moment where we connected deeply with each other. It's my favorite way to communicate.

### How to start getting speaking opportunities [17:40]

— Well, you make a good case. So, how do we do it? Would you recommend that somebody starts by learning how to be a good or even a great speaker first and then works on finding speaking gigs or the other way around? — I think it can be done both ways. I really do because I've seen people I'm like, you go find some free stages that you can get in front of. Whether that is you're going to go to a dinner party and you're going to stand up in front of that dinner party and you're going to give a little 10-minute speech or you're going to go to your local YMCA or your local yoga studio and you're going to say, "Hey, I want to do just an hour event for your people and speak or like your local retirement home and ask to speak in front of people and just get your feet wet. " Like when I first started, I was like, "I will speak anywhere for anyone for free. I do not care. I just want to get my reps in. " We get good at what we practice. And public speaking is absolutely something that you only get good at when you do it. And I don't just mean talking in front of a mirror. I actual people because it's a completely different experience when you get in front of people. It doesn't matter if it's five or 5,000. It is totally different than just talking to yourself. So I would say to people, work on it on your own. Like watch some YouTube videos, watch my content. I give a lot of great tips. Study it. Like work on what you would want to say, your messaging points. But even more importantly than just being in your head, get out there and start talking. Get in front of people or I do love to use this tool and go live or make videos and talk in front of the camera and practice saying your messaging and even more important practice storytelling.

### Why storytelling is the key to powerful speaking [19:11]

The best speakers are by far the best storytellers in stage leaders. That's the number one thing that we use to build out our keynotes. I say stories first. We find the stories that answer the questions to our audience's pain points and we tie a painoint with a story and we build our keynote all around different stories so that the keynote isn't just about like teaching a bunch of stuff and being completely boring with like frameworks and methodology that'll just no one will ever remember. Everything that they teach is built inside of a story that's entertaining, emotional, and moves people to some sort of action. How do you go about crafting a keynote speech? Do you start with an outline and then you think of stories that you could incorporate in? What other major steps are there or is that not how you go about it at all? — No, in stage leaders, I have a framework that I build called the story mansion blueprint and I envision building a keynote almost like building a house. And so I have all the different bedrooms where I put different stories, but really in essence without teaching the entire framework because that would take us way too long. I think about what is my guiding force of my talk. So what is the thing that I want the audience to walk away with? What is the problem that I'm solving? That's the most important thing that you want to know. I think a lot of speakers make the mistake and I used to make this mistake a lot. They make their keynote the Mim me eye show. I just want to get on stage and tell people my story. Guess what? Most people don't give a crap about your story. So sorry. Like it's a little bit of tough love. They I had to learn this the hard way. Someone said to me that I very admire much admired. They're like, "This is the Mimi Eye Show. This is the gen show and nobody cares. If you're going to speak in front of an audience, they are there to listen to you to get a takeaway for them. So, you need to go into it knowing what is the problem I'm solving for this audience and what are they going to get away from this talk by the end. That is the number one thing you need to know. Once you know that thing, then I distill that down and I say, okay, what are the most frequently asked questions that live inside this big problem? So, if my big problem that I'm solving is how to have the courage to be seen, which is what my keynote is about, what are all the other questions that people are asking me within that big problem? Well, they're asking me how do I overcome rejection when somebody rejects me when I put myself out there? How do I have the confidence to actually make a video when I don't feel ready and I feel cringy or ugly or I don't like the way that I look sound? How do I practice being seen when I don't really know how to start practicing or what's the importance of practicing? And I think about all of those little questions that the people would be asking within the big guiding force and I tie a story that has the answer to that question inside that story to each of those questions and I put those as the different bedrooms in my keynote. I tie them together with transitions. I have a really strong opener and a really strong close and that's basically how I build keynotes. Everybody does it differently. And in stage leaders, I walk people through this framework so that no matter what, if your keynote's 60 minutes or 20 minutes or 30 minutes or 45, you can take things out and put them in and you can make it for whatever you're going to

### Common mistakes public speakers make [22:09]

and you can customize it as you see fit. — That sounds like an amazing way to put together a speech and like it would make for a very compelling and interesting presentation. You know, I think we've all heard plenty of speakers in our lives and some of them have been interesting and some have been boring. And the ones that are boring are generally either the ones where there's not enough stories or the ones that only tell stories and there doesn't seem to be very much of a point to the story. So, it's just as rambling or we're not really taking away very much like value or application from it. So, I love that. Now, let's talk about some of the most common mistakes that you see people making when they are interested in becoming a public speaker. They're interested in getting on stages and using that visibility to grow their businesses. What are Yeah. What are some of them those most common mistakes that people make? — I made all of them and I still make some of them [clears throat] today. They you can't escape them when you're out there speaking a lot. So I would say that the first one we already talked about making it all about yourself the mimi eye some of my most talented stage leader students have beautiful keynotes when they come to me but it's like I just want to share my story and there's no takeaway there's no point it's just sharing the story and like you just said you can share your story but the only person that really wants to hear that in that moment is like your mom or someone that loves you very much — they want to hear the story but strangers that you don't know they want the takeaway. So the first one I would say is making it all about yourself and not having a strong takeaway for the audience or several takeaways for the audience. Another big mistake that speakers make is body language and movement. When I work with people in person, it's interesting. This is actually two in one, Gillian. So not just body language and movement, but being too performing and too showy and becoming a speaker robot. They totally go together. So, for instance, I'm going to use you as an example. Just like let's say we're here. We're chilling. We're having this conversation. Like we're totally being normal and real and you're talking to me. You're like, "Jen, like normal normal. " And then I'm like, "Okay, now Gillian, so start your speech. " And then all of a sudden you go, "I went to the store. " And you become this person that you're not. I I'm sure you've seen very showy, very performy speakers. They pace all back and forth of the stage and they're just so big almost like they're doing a musical theater performance and they're — maybe they were the drama kids. I don't know. — I was the drama kid. So, I started speaking this way. This is why remember I told you I was so bad in the beginning. I was putting on a performance cuz I didn't understand the difference between being a performer and a communicator. A communicator is just having a conversation like a normal person, as if you were out to lunch with a friend, just a little tiny bit elevated, and looking at people in the eye and talking to them like a normal person. Not becoming a speaker robot, not pacing back and forth, not jazz hands, not using huge gestures and being like all crazy. What that does is it makes people not really trust you because it feels like you're saying lines. being someone that you're not. And the key to being a really phenomenal speaker is being vulnerable and truthful and making the people in the audience feel like you are saying these words for the first time and you are saying them directly to them. So when you are practicing your speech, I would advise you guys as a little takeaway. Imagine I just I tell all my students I'm like go to lunch. Go to lunch with a friend. Imagine that you are just going out with your best friend and your best friend is asking you questions about the topic that you talk about. They're saying, "Oh my gosh, Jen, how do I have the courage to be seen? I'm terrified to post on social media. So rather than me performing my talk and saying, "Oh my god, like this is what you have to do. " I'm just going to say, "Listen, I'm going to tell you a quick story that's really going to help you post on social media. " Because when I first started, I was terrified. Let me tell you a story. And just talk to them the way or practice doing your talk the way that you'd speak to somebody if you were hanging out with them at lunch. And then when you put it on a stage, you elevate it a touch, but not that much. So you just said that this was a twoin one where sometimes people are too showy, but on the flip side, right, is where maybe they become very like stilted or stoic almost. They're frozen. Is that the flip side? — Oh, no. The two in one was the movement because I said the movement. So the movement goes with being too showy. — That's usually the biggest problem. The biggest problem is like — moving too much. The nervous energy just gets in you. I don't know if you've ever seen like the speaker that's pacing back and forth there. Every once in a while you'll see someone that freezes up a little bit and they're very uncomfortable and then they need to know what to do with their hands, — how to relax. Exactly. But that all really just takes practice. — It takes getting up and doing it again and again and understanding what your body feels like when you truly relax — and knowing what it feels like to only move because you need to. And especially this is for people that freeze up too and can't move. Just know in your keynote, okay, this is what I think about at least. I'll say, "All right, there I've got all these people in the front row that I'm going to look at. " And I usually make eye contact with my audience. And that's I'm talking to individuals in my audience as I speak to them. I'm not looking over their heads. I'm not looking out at the big lights. I'm looking at individuals. And so I'll know, okay, the first beat of my story, I'm going to go over here and I'm going to talk to this guy. — stand here and talk to this guy for a minute. And then I'm going to leave this guy. And because I'm starting a new topic, I'm going to walk over here and I'm going to talk to her. And when I'm done talking to her, now I'm going to go in the middle and I'm going to open it up and I'm going to talk to everyone for a second and then I'm going to zone in on this girl. So it's like you're moving with intention. And then of course if there's a moment in your talk where you're talking about a transition. So maybe you're saying one story and you are planted dead center in the middle of that stage holding your power sharing your story and then you shift into another one. You transition. That's a really great excuse to move stage right. And then you move as you transition and then you plant yourself there. So, if you know where your beats are in your keynote, when you're going to move, then you don't have to have that weird feeling of like I'm pacing all over the stage or I don't even know what I'm going to do, so I'm not going to do anything. Love that. That's a great tip. So, maybe let's talk about one more mistake that people make with the speaking itself, kind of coming on the tail of those two that you just shared, and then I'd love to transition into talking about some mistakes that people make when they're trying to get on a stage. So mistakes they make when they're maybe like trying to pitch a venue that they want to be a speaker at or just a mistakes that they make with the strategy of how they are going to become a sought-after speaker. But first one more mistake they make when they're on the stage. — Yeah. Vocal variety. Um have you seen the movie Ferris Buer's Day Off? — I have not. I should watch that. — Okay. So most — I'm sure everybody else has. It's kind of like a classic Gillian trope. You ask me, "Have you seen such and such a movie? " The answer is almost always no. So assume everybody else has seen it. — Have you heard the Buler thing? So there's this character in that movie and he's this teacher and it comes back to this teacher all the time and he sounds so monotone. He's so boring. He says Beller and he's so like everything he says is just the same monotone. It is very easy for speakers to get monotone without realizing it or they have the same pattern in their voice their entire way through their talk. It's very easy to notice this when you listen to recordings of yourself and you can only notice it if you really listen for it. — I do it sometimes even today like even in a podcast like this like we all have a melody that we follow. — When you are speaking on stage you want to take your audience on a journey. You do not want them to fall into a melody of your voice. You don't want to put them to sleep. You want to have moments where you're talking really, really fast and you've got really fast tempo. And then you want to have moments when you slow it down and you get serious. And then you want to have moments when you get really loud and really excited and you take them there. You take them to church. But then, and so vocal variety, switching up your melody, switching up your tempo, switching up your tone, switching up your volume regularly is going to keep your audience interested. Never getting in that stagnant, repetitive cadence of voice, — but probably still not overdoing the vocal variety, right? Because then we could get start to get overly dramatic just like you were talking about natural. There's nothing wrong with it. I mean, in natural life, like in natural life, if I was really talking to you and I'm like, "Okay, so this is so serious, Gillian. " Okay, so now I'm going to tell you, but you seriously seriously, okay, this is like you really cannot tell anyone. Okay, I'm totally normal, but I just went slower. I was quieter. I was louder. It just was a little bit more fun, right? And it was it shared a little bit more of my intention behind what I was saying than if I just said, "I'm going to tell you something, but you really can't tell anyone. " Right. — Fair. Yeah. — Okay. — Well, now let's move on and talk about some mistakes, like I was saying before, that people might make with kind of their strategy of getting on the stage. I'm sure there are a lot of them. Well, I don't know about that because listen, there's not one right or wrong way to do anything, especially getting opportunities. There are probably ways to get stages that nobody has ever heard of before because it's never been done. Like, you could get a stage from going to a freaking dinner party and standing up at the dinner party and saying, "Hey, does anybody know any stages that I could be on? " And maybe somebody in that room knows somebody that has an event coming up and then you get hired. That would not be a typical thing for a speaker coach to say, "Hey, you should go to dinner parties and announce at the dinner party that you want to be a speaker, but it could work. " So, I think there's many, many ways to get on stages. And I implore everybody, if you want opportunities, you need to talk about the fact that you want to speak all the time. — You need to share about it on social media. You need to hit up your friends and tell them that you want to. You need to be doing outreach. connecting with other speakers. bureaus. You need to be connecting with event planners and connecting with them on social media, connecting with them in person, going to events, doing everything on planet Earth to make yourself known and seen. I don't think that there's like a big mistake other than being ridiculously annoying and not — providing value and not being a kind person when you're reaching out. I think that's the biggest mistake. But I don't really know many people that aren't kind people. And I mean, maybe there are some that are doing it wrong, but listen, be kind. Don't be crazy. Don't be annoying. Don't spam people. Don't spell their name wrong if you're writing them an email. If it's a person that you want to connect with on the internet that is a successful person that's very wellknown, don't just spam text them and ask them for something if you haven't built a relationship with them yet. That won't get answered. Don't send people voice notes that you don't know. They're not going to respond because listen to it. Don't send people video notes that you don't know because they're not going to watch it. They don't know what they're going to get because they don't know you. But other than that, like, shoot your shot. shoot shot. Well, I love that reframe and that just different perspective on it. The reason that I said that I think that there's a lot of mistakes that people make is because I know that there are a lot of people who want to be public speakers and so they do I would say two main things that they try really hard at them and they don't work. One of them is the thing you were just describing where basically they are cold pitching people. They're cold pitching people with voice notes or videos to try to make it more personal, try to prove it's not AI or just a bot, you know, that sort of thing. Or maybe they are just sending text messages, for lack of a better word, direct messages to people on Instagram or on LinkedIn, you know, and they're essentially cold pitching. Doesn't tend to work. The other thing that I see people do is that they just apply for larger events and they don't get picked. You know, they don't have a portfolio. the person who's running the event doesn't know who they are. They don't have those connections, right? So, I love this reframe where you're saying like you just need to basically do like authentic networking and talk about how like the fact that you want to do more public speaking. — Yeah. It's really when it comes down to it, it's a relationship game. We don't teach to cold pitch. We teach to warm pitch. Meaning, we teach to build relationships first and then get referrals and then get connected to somebody and then send a warm pitch. But listen, I have a lot of speaker friends that do a crap ton of outbound. Crap ton meaning cold outbound emails and they are really good at it and they work. But I believe that the reason that they work is because these speakers have strong assets, meaning they have strong social media platforms, they have strong reels, they have strong speaker kits, they have strong websites. If you have all of that in place, cold outbound pitching is not a terrible idea. If you do not have that in place and you're just getting started, it's more of a relationship game. Getting your first shot. It means building relationships with people that have stages, building relationships with other speakers, asking to speak for free places and getting up there and crushing it, getting footage of you crushing it, posting it all over social media, saying on social media that you want to speak more, hunting down events that you know pick speakers to speak for free, possibly maybe even paying to speak on a stage. I'm not anti-doing that. I'm not. I think that it could be a really great opportunity for you to get great footage of yourself. I think it's a great opportunity for you to meet other people in the industry. And if you know that you can get up there and you can totally crush it and get beautiful footage of you on a stage and you have to pay to do it, that might be a door that opens to other opportunities. So, I'm not anti that. It really is a hustle in the beginning. All of my speaker friends that are really successful, they all say the same thing to me. They're like, "I remember when I was getting started, I would speak anywhere and everywhere all the time for free to practice, get my reps in and meet people. " Because if you're really good, that one stage will turn into another one. That's called spin. And then that will turn into another one. And then before you know it, you have a reel. And then you put that reel together and you put that thing on the internet. And then you start showing that reel to people. And

### Overcoming the fear of being seen [36:08]

then that's another asset that you have that's going to help you get booked. It's an ongoing flywheel that we're constantly building. Now, aside from the practical and the tactical that we've been talking about, how to get on a stage, how to give a good presentation, there's also that fear of being seen, right, which is what I know your keynote is about. So, the last thing I wanted to talk to you about is if you could just give us the micro mini version of your keynote and help inspire the listeners to have that courage to be seen. When it comes down to it, I am sure that your listeners are unbelievably grateful that you decided to pick up a microphone and be seen because I would bet that there's somebody that's listening to this podcast whose life you have changed because you had the courage to put yourself in this position where people could see it. And so if you're a listener right now and you're listening to this podcast and you've been listening to it for a long time and you go on walks with Gillian all every single week and you've been learning about your business from Gileian every single week, could you imagine if she decided that she was not going to start this podcast because she was too afraid that people weren't going to like it? That would really suck. That would really, really suck. Gillian, in fact, because you had this idea to have a podcast and because you have all this knowledge and because you're good at interviewing people, it is in fact your responsibility to make yourself visible to those people. Because every day that goes by that you don't, those people that need you are going to go listen to someone else who might not be as good as you and who might not care as much as you simply because you are too scared to put yourself out there. In fact, that I would call selfish. So, I do have something for everybody to do if they are terrified of being seen. I use this acronym every single day. I think about it every day when I go to make a video, do a podcast like this, when I speak on a stage, I think about the word hope. And for me, it stands for help one person every day. Because if you are scared to be seen, it's because you're worried about the wrong thing. You're thinking about yourself. What do I sound like? What do I look like? Will people like me? Am I good enough? Am I smart enough? But if you're creating content on the internet, it's not for you. It's for the person on the other side of the phone or listening to the podcast or reading the book or reading the blog post or in the theater or listening to you speak that needed to hear the thing that you had to say that day. You're creating content to help other people. And when you get onto the stage or you pull out your phone and you just say, "I'm making a FaceTime style, selfie style video for someone and helping them right now. I'm going to send them this video. " Takes away the ego. It takes away the because it's not about you anymore. It's about helping someone. — Thank you, Jen. That was perfect. And thank you so much for your time today and everything that you've shared with us about how to use public speaking to grow businesses and how to do so effectively. So, thank you so much. Thanks for having me, Gillian.