# Fear of Abandonment Is Ruining Your Love Life #relationships #psychology ## Метаданные - **Канал:** Dr. Daniel Fox - **YouTube:** https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g - **Дата:** 18.05.2026 - **Длительность:** 2:05 - **Просмотры:** 1,105 - **Источник:** https://ekstraktznaniy.ru/video/51849 ## Описание Playlist Series Link: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLaZELV1Tbq-NOp6VC8O_f8KextRNHODwt Series: Why You Can’t Relax in Relationships Episode 1: When Love Feels Conditional Go deeper at www.drdfox.com — worksheets, courses, and more When love feels fragile, your body can stay on alert even before anything happens. This is not overreacting. It is what happens when your system learns that connection can change fast. In this video, Dr. Daniel Fox explains how personality patterns, emotional regulation difficulties, and relationship dynamics influence behavior—especially during moments of stress, conflict, or fear of abandonment. This content is designed to increase understanding, reduce shame, and help viewers recognize what’s happening beneath emotional reactions. 🎓 ONLINE COURSE Learn evidence-based skills for understanding and managing borderline personality disorder: https://www.bpdcourse.com 📚 BOOKS & CLINICAL TOOLS BY DR. DANIEL FOX • The Relationships Workbook for BPD – ## Транскрипт ### Relationship Feels Unstable [] If you're watching this, there's a good chance that something in your relationship feels unstable. Maybe ### Fighting and Replaying It [0:05] there's fighting, maybe you reacted strongly and now you're kind of replaying it, questioning it. Maybe you ### The Text You Regret [0:11] sent a text that you now regret. Or ### Fear They’re Pulling Away [0:14] maybe you're sitting with fear that they're pulling away. That can be an ### Abandonment and Rejection Activation [0:19] activator of abandonment rejection fears. Even the fear of eventual emptiness and intensity of those feelings, of those activations can feel disproportionate. And that's kind of where the fear comes from. ### Activated, Not Just Upset [0:38] from. Because you're not just upset, you feel activated. Your chest tightens, your thoughts race, you imagine losing them, that they leave your life, and you imagine feeling rejected. And then ### Emptiness, Shame, and Confusion [0:51] after it settles, maybe that's where that emptiness starts to come in. Or there could be shame. Perhaps you feel ashamed about what you said or what you texted or what you did. Or you could even feel confused and ashamed. And the confusion may be about why it escalated so quickly. And this may or may not be unique to you in this or perhaps in other relationships. ### Love Learned Something [1:21] relationships. But that's not random. That's a system that learned something about love, what ### Connection Feels Fragile [1:26] feels conditional, even subtly. Your nervous system learns that connection is fragile. ### Why You Can’t Relax [1:34] fragile. If connection is fragile, you can't relax, you don't relax. You monitor, you ### Monitoring for Shifts [1:39] anticipate, you react quickly to shifts or even the fear of perceived shifts. ### Vigilance Feels Necessary [1:47] Because if love can change suddenly, vigilance feels necessary. And it can even be a hyper-vigilance. So you just ### Constant Alarm [1:55] have this constant alert, this constant alarm going off. And when vigilance is ### When Chaos Increases [1:59] constant, the probability of chaos increases.