# Fear of Abandonment Is Ruining Your Love Life #relationships #psychology ## Метаданные - **Канал:** Dr. Daniel Fox - **YouTube:** https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g - **Дата:** 18.05.2026 - **Длительность:** 2:05 - **Просмотры:** 1,105 ## Описание Playlist Series Link: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLaZELV1Tbq-NOp6VC8O_f8KextRNHODwt Series: Why You Can’t Relax in Relationships Episode 1: When Love Feels Conditional Go deeper at www.drdfox.com — worksheets, courses, and more When love feels fragile, your body can stay on alert even before anything happens. This is not overreacting. It is what happens when your system learns that connection can change fast. In this video, Dr. Daniel Fox explains how personality patterns, emotional regulation difficulties, and relationship dynamics influence behavior—especially during moments of stress, conflict, or fear of abandonment. This content is designed to increase understanding, reduce shame, and help viewers recognize what’s happening beneath emotional reactions. 🎓 ONLINE COURSE Learn evidence-based skills for understanding and managing borderline personality disorder: https://www.bpdcourse.com 📚 BOOKS & CLINICAL TOOLS BY DR. DANIEL FOX • The Relationships Workbook for BPD – Skills to cultivate emotional safety and stronger connections https://www.amazon.com/Relationships-Workbook-BPD-Understanding-Connections/dp/1648486053 • BPD Guided Journal – A structured space to process intense emotions and build self-compassion https://shorturl.at/Ta5Dj • The BPD Card Deck – 50 practical strategies for emotional regulation https://shorturl.at/jBHJV • Complex Borderline Personality Disorder – Understanding co-occurring conditions https://rb.gy/hdyqyy • Antisocial, Narcissistic, and Borderline Personality Disorders – A modern clinical framework https://tinyurl.com/2anv8dww • The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook – An integrative skills-based program https://goo.gl/LQEgy1 • Antisocial, Borderline, Narcissistic & Histrionic Workbook (IPBA Benjamin Franklin Gold Award Winner) https://goo.gl/BLRkFy • Narcissistic Personality Disorder Toolbox (IPBA Benjamin Franklin Silver Award Winner) https://goo.gl/sZYhym 👤 ABOUT DR. DANIEL J. FOX Daniel J. Fox, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist in Texas, international speaker, and multi-award-winning author. He has over 20 years of experience specializing in the assessment and treatment of personality disorders across state and federal prison systems, universities, and private practice. His clinical focus includes personality disorders, ethics, burnout prevention, emotional intelligence, and relationship functioning. 🌐 CONNECT WITH DR. FOX YouTube: https://youtube.com/@DrDanielFox Website: http://www.drdfox.com Blog (Psychology Today): https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-complex-diagnosis Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drdfox Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/appliedpsychservices/ Twitter/X: https://twitter.com/DrDanielJFox1 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drdfox/ Amazon Author Page: https://amazon.com/author/drfox 00:00 Relationship Feels Unstable 00:05 Fighting and Replaying It 00:11 The Text You Regret 00:14 Fear They’re Pulling Away 00:19 Abandonment and Rejection Activation 00:38 Activated, Not Just Upset 00:51 Emptiness, Shame, and Confusion 01:21 Love Learned Something 01:26 Connection Feels Fragile 01:34 Why You Can’t Relax 01:39 Monitoring for Shifts 01:47 Vigilance Feels Necessary 01:55 Constant Alarm 01:59 When Chaos Increases ## Содержание ### [0:00](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g) Relationship Feels Unstable If you're watching this, there's a good chance that something in your relationship feels unstable. Maybe ### [0:05](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=5s) Fighting and Replaying It there's fighting, maybe you reacted strongly and now you're kind of replaying it, questioning it. Maybe you ### [0:11](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=11s) The Text You Regret sent a text that you now regret. Or ### [0:14](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=14s) Fear They’re Pulling Away maybe you're sitting with fear that they're pulling away. That can be an ### [0:19](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=19s) Abandonment and Rejection Activation activator of abandonment rejection fears. Even the fear of eventual emptiness and intensity of those feelings, of those activations can feel disproportionate. And that's kind of where the fear comes from. ### [0:38](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=38s) Activated, Not Just Upset from. Because you're not just upset, you feel activated. Your chest tightens, your thoughts race, you imagine losing them, that they leave your life, and you imagine feeling rejected. And then ### [0:51](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=51s) Emptiness, Shame, and Confusion after it settles, maybe that's where that emptiness starts to come in. Or there could be shame. Perhaps you feel ashamed about what you said or what you texted or what you did. Or you could even feel confused and ashamed. And the confusion may be about why it escalated so quickly. And this may or may not be unique to you in this or perhaps in other relationships. ### [1:21](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=81s) Love Learned Something relationships. But that's not random. That's a system that learned something about love, what ### [1:26](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=86s) Connection Feels Fragile feels conditional, even subtly. Your nervous system learns that connection is fragile. ### [1:34](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=94s) Why You Can’t Relax fragile. If connection is fragile, you can't relax, you don't relax. You monitor, you ### [1:39](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=99s) Monitoring for Shifts anticipate, you react quickly to shifts or even the fear of perceived shifts. ### [1:47](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=107s) Vigilance Feels Necessary Because if love can change suddenly, vigilance feels necessary. And it can even be a hyper-vigilance. So you just ### [1:55](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=115s) Constant Alarm have this constant alert, this constant alarm going off. And when vigilance is ### [1:59](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxwS181NZ3g&t=119s) When Chaos Increases constant, the probability of chaos increases. --- *Источник: https://ekstraktznaniy.ru/video/51849*