Doctor Reacts to Family Guy Medical Scenes

All right, Robert. The fertilization device is complete. — Fertilization? — Impregnate me with the child that will bring Brian and me back together. — I don't know what he's hoping to do here. They injected something into his umbilicus, but he doesn't have a uterus. What is the plan here? He's going to poop out a new baby. — Good morning, Brian. What is that? I smell pee. — Yes, you do, Brian. — He gave himself a tumor. You know, some men will actually fail like a sports drug test, and the reason they fail the blood test is not because they're using a banned substances, but because they have a testicular tumor. — What have you done? I think you mean what have we done? What, Brian? We're pregnant. — Oh my god. I took your DNA and inserted it into my temporary uterus through my fertilization device. — What's a temporary uterus? — Oh my god, you're serious. People are going to think I had sex with a male baby and then got him pregnant. — Oh, thank you for finding a way to make it sound horrible. — It sounds horrible and not scientifically plausible. — Jeez, how far along are you? — I'm not really sure. 2 days, 6 months. There's a certain amount of guesswork involved in this. — You know, we could actually do the measurement uh by measuring uh above the super pubic area to the end of the round portion of the belly. — Oh, my back is killing me. And I've also been experiencing a little — oh — morning sickness. — That was projectile vomiting. Uh in a baby I'm worried about pyloric stenosis. — Let's get a few candids. Dad, can I get one of your head on the belly? — Oh, Dad. I just got emotional. — I feel like he has a small bowel obstruction. He's vomiting because of the small bowel obstruction and it's creating a buildup of gas. — I'm having such a craving for burgers. It's like my body is just craving red meat and mint chip ice cream, but only mint chip. — A little pika goes a long way. — What are you looking at? Go push your buttons. My husband will kick your ass. — Stop saying I'm your husband. — Oh, Brian, I need you to take me to the hospital. Why? — My water just broke. — Why is this so realistic? — You're going to have to drive a little faster. I'm already going over the speed limit. You're too late. Pull over. It's starting to come out. You know, I just realized it hit me that I'm trying to critique a cartoon about a male baby creating a baby with a canine. The whole time I'm talking about the scientific implausibility of that. And there is a canine driving the vehicle. And I realize that I've perhaps not suspended my disbelief early enough into this episode. — Brian, I'm going to need you to deliver the baby. Okay. C can you wait a second while I put a towel down? I don't want anything to get on the seats. Oh, no. Of course. Our first priority should be to keep the vinyl clean. — Vinyl? Who has vinyl seats in a Toyota Prius? You got to get that cloth or you're upgrading to the leather, baby. — Can you see the head? I don't know WHERE TO LOOK, BUT MAYBE YOU SHOULD LOOK AT THE PART OF ME WHERE THERE'S A BABY COMING OUT. HOW DID MURPHY BROWN MAKE THIS LOOK SO EASY? CAREFUL. Don't get anything on the — Oh, seats. OH GOD, I THINK ANOTHER ONE'S COMING. I DON'T SEE IT. I THINK IT'S COMING OUT OF MY MOUTH. THERE'S MORE. I'm sure this is not the commercial Toyota imagined for their Prius. What is happening? Okay, while this is all ridiculous, I want one. — I just put Jack and Rose down for their nap, and I'm trying to keep the more attractive ones in this area. — This is a nightmare. — Oh, I caught two of them trying to eat each other, so that's something we need to watch out for. — You know, Bear was born in a litter of like 13 and almost all of them died. He a survivor. — This is for the best. — Yeah. I mean, I'm sure they'll be adopted. — Oh, god. Yeah. I'm still keeping all the gifts from the baby shower. — You had a baby shower? — They have cats that are like bred with some kind of wild type savannah cat and they're called F1 mixes or something based on the generation that they are. This is that but human dog. Homo canine sap. Oh, well, every Halloween me, Joe, and Quagmire do this thing where one of us is it and then the other two of us nail the crap out of him with awesome pranks. — Well, who's it this year? — Hey, get away. JUST GET AWAY FROM ME, PETER. — HEY, TAKE IT EASY, QUAGMIRE. Nobody wants to hurt you, right, Joe? — Hepatitis C. — Jokes's on you. I already got it. — Menitis. I'm a carrier. — What does that mean? You're a carrier. You could at least say you just got the Bixerero menitis vaccine. — I don't know, Joe. That's it. We're out

of known diseases. Unless — you go to Russia and you get that smallox baby. What are they getting here? Uh, Ebola. Oh, malaria. — All right. What this is has no name, so you can't have it. I love the he he's sick to fly or this the mosquito onto him. Oh, — we got him. Halloween is fun. — That's a dangerous game to play because some conditions are lethal real quick. And by the way, if you have a unique condition, let's say from Africa, from visiting Africa, and you don't tell your doctor that you just came back from Africa, we're going to have a terrible time diagnosing you. In fact, I guarantee you, you will be misdiagnosed. — Peter, you got to come outside. — This already feels like an episode of Hoarders uh strange addiction where the person's stuck inside their home. They're keeping all their bottles of beer and Chinese food. It does look like a healthy lifestyle. We'll leave it at that. Oh, that's called stuck to the sofa pillow ititis. You know, skin tears are a real thing and they can happen. It's different than a delving injury. Don't Google it. This is going to be painful. Although, maybe if he has a hairy back, it's just going to be a back wax. — You'll be fine. Here's a video to help you understand. When a fat guy's sweaty skin presses against couch fabric for an extended period of time, the fabric fibers fuse together with the skin. — No, they don't. This is like I think they're trying to paint the picture of licking an ice pole or a metal pole when it's icy out. The longer you stay sedentary, the stronger the bond. — You know what's interesting though? Wild medical concept, but if you do have two organs that are touching together for a long period of time, and if they're rubbing, there's friction, there's inflammation, you can develop a passageway, also known as a fistula. So, you can have your intestines create a passageway into your bladder where, yes, your worst fear comes true. You pee poop. YOU PEOPLE. — OH, HELL NO. THAT'S — UH, HEY, MOM. Was I always able to see the living room from the kitchen? — I've had enough of this. That stupid couch is messing up our house. If Peter won't let Dr. Hartman remove it, we're doing it ourselves. I put an ambient in his beer so he's out cold. — An ambient is not going to keep someone asleep if you start performing surgery on them. Not that I'm ever recommending anyone tries that. I saw you put ambient in your beer, too. Every adult has to take ambient every night to even have a prayer at sleep. — Not true. It's only used for short form insomnia. Short-term insomnia. — I can't tell the skin from couch. — Well, air on the skin side. I love this couch. — It's from Ethan Allen, you know. — So, are they going to cut his skin or the fabric or both? Because they're not going to be able to disinfect that area quickly enough. This is not even a sterile environment. I'm concerned. What's going on, — Peter? Enough is enough. That couch is coming off. We're sick of your shenanigans. — HOW DARE YOU? I WORKED my ass off to bring home the bacon for this family. And all you can say is, "We don't want bacon. We want actual money. " WELL, I DON'T HAVE MONEY. I SPENT IT ALL ON BACON. — PETER, PUT YOURSELF in our shoes. — I can't. MY FEET SWELLED UP TOO MUCH FROM ALL THE BACON. — That can happen if you have congestive heart failure and you consume uh products rich in sodium. You can get overloaded to the point where your feet and lower legs do swell. Interestingly enough, there have been cases of people saying that they've woken up while on ambient and had no control over what they were doing. So much so that they committed murders and tried to blame the ambient. — I'm going to sleep on the couch. On the couch, — I'm going to sleep couch squared. — Pivot. Pivot, Peter. Pivot. You know what? Just give me a push. — I'm sure the couch provided adequate cushioning for that. But fall. — Peter, you should really slow down. You've already had like 30 hamburgers. — Shut up, Brian. It relieves the pain of mustachlessness. — Are they in White Castle where you get those like mini burgers? — And it's working. I no longer feel the pain. Come to think of it, I can't really feel anything on the left half of my body. Really? That doesn't sound good. — That sounds like a stroke. And I'd be concerned, especially with his little speech difficulty that he's having there. — Oh, — Peter, are you winking at me?

— He's getting developing a droop. — Oh my god, someone call an ambulance. — This is where time is of the essence because there's a certain window that we can help treat the clot with a medication known as TPA. — Mrs. Griffin, your husband has had a stroke. — I presume es schemic, but it could be hemorrhagic. Remember, there are two types. Eskeemic is there's a blockage in blood flow in the blood vessels. hemorrhagic, meaning that the blood flow is spreading in the brain in a sense because the blood vessels have ruptured and there's bleeding. But the problem is kind of universal because in both scenarios, the brain's not getting enough oxygen because when blood flow from a blockage, not enough oxygen, it dies. If the blood vessels start bleeding out, the brain's not getting enough blood flow, not enough oxygen. — The left half of his body is completely paralyzed. — Oh my god, Peter, sweetheart, how do you feel? Uh, had better days, Lois. Had better days. — At least he's able to speak because sometimes with a stroke, you might get uh some kind of aphasia. — Have you ever had a chiropractic adjustment? What's that? It's a procedure where a guy who couldn't get into medical school tries to rip your head off. Does it work? If you believe it works. It's kind of like the Polar Express. Let's do it. Okay, I'll give it a shot. — Isn't he not a chiropractor? Holy crap. What happened? Well, I think we simply found your true height before years of poor posture and wear and tear crushed your spirit and your spine. — Imagine it was that simple. My big criticism, especially of chiropractic videos on social media, is that no matter what condition people come in for, the treatment is always the same. the midback crack, the neck rotation crack, and the lumbar rotate the knees push on the lumbar spine. And while maybe there are utilities for certain adjustments, to say they're universal, no matter what issue someone's having, leads me to be incredibly skeptical. And I'm putting that nicely. — I was able to remove his tumor. And if anyone wants to keep it, it's here in this Tupperware. — Tupperware. Biohazard. We send it out to get tested. First of all, cytology. Come on. Hystopathology. — This is half of a chicken cutlet. Oh boy, what did I HAVE FOR LUNCH? OH MY GOD, HE fullon ate his glyobblasto multififorme. Wonder what the caloric content of that is. Okay, a harmonica inside the abdomen. Interesting. — Well, the harmonica is up there pretty good. — But did he insert it from down below or from up above? — Unfortunately, removing it would require a very expensive surgery that's not covered by your TGI Friday's gift card. — Gives new meaning to a toot. Okay, heart sounds good. — I try not to say good, bad, awesome, terrible. That's judgmental. Ideally, what you want to say is normal. It sounds accelerated. It sounds slow. There's decreased bowel sounds, increased bowel sounds, less judgmental, more objective. — All right, Mr. Griffin, I'm just going to need you to drop your pants and we'll check your prostate. — What? Drop your pants, turn around, and lean forward. — Okay, so how's this work? You just feel my pulse OR WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT, MR. GRIFFIN, THAT'S A prostate exam. — SHUT UP. YOU HAD YOUR FINGER IN my ass. — That's how a prostate exam is performed. — It's called digital rectal exam. — Now, if you'll JUST LET ME — GET AWAY FROM ME. — YOU SHOULD TELL THE patient everything you're doing beforehand. And lubrication helps. — I am over the Simpsons. — What are you saying? I'm saying the Simpsons suck. — Oh, YOU — WHY did they do this crossover? First the pit, now Family Guy. — Their form is terrible. All upper body punches. Oh, I like Homer's movement on defense. Oh my goodness, this is so violent. Actually, this is reminding me more of Deadpool vers Wolverine. All right. So if your body is being held in place by doors of a bus, you will be developing neck spasms most prominently of the sternocclemastoid muscle as well as the parispinal muscles and the anterior and posterior scaline muscles of the neck. And then as your body is being hit across multiple vehicles, you're going to develop significant damage in your femur, most notably around the greater troanter. Oh, — that's going to be a new mothorax until proven otherwise. Oh. — Oh, okay. He can't last long in that position. — I'm in danger. — Yeah, you are. Oh, you got to be careful of the radiation. — Oh, don't move. They're making their

way. — Hey, that's no fair. I don't got none of them. — Is that true? Family Guy has no Emmys. Oh, wow. I prefer them this way. — I don't know what this green substance is, but it can't be good for their skin. Oh, it's Incredible Hulk. Now, — so this is how the big bang happened. Oh, psychomatic arch. Multiple teeth coming out. The vulsions are real. Oh. Oh my god. The exalamos the eye. — Oh, I feel bad for the carpals. The metacarpals. KRYPTONITE. — OH, right in the scrotum. — Say hi to Mod Flander. — Now you say hi to Muriel Goldman. Oh, well, he can't be alive, surely. This is not compatible with Simpsons life. — What are you still doing here? — I think you're gonna get a kick out of this. You're parked behind me at your place. — That is funny. Literally th this is Wolverine meets Deadpool fighting to the death. Click here to check it out. Marvel reaction. As always, stay happy and healthy.