Who Decides the Definition of Success?

Here I am 49 I've talked a lot of people do a lot of things for free yes

Here I am 49 I've talked a lot of people do a lot of things for free yes

for years yes I don't feel business as a health yep new website yep Brandon in

for years yes I don't feel business as a health yep new website yep Brandon in

our Travel Club and everything and in my wife because she's didn't know who you

our Travel Club and everything and in my wife because she's didn't know who you

were yep and she goes so what are you gonna ask him I said I don't know and she's like

were yep and she goes so what are you gonna ask him I said I don't know and she's like

why don't you ask him how long do you have to do it for free no it says listen like listen I'll be honest with you I'm almost sure about it as well because it is 100% my biggest vulnerability to it might be at different scales people may look at like all this but I've left so much on the table right like I owe nothing of why my brain AJ 150 percent of this when I had all the leverage like I've left so much and my great fear is resentment okay and that's what I keep telling her is that here's the thing I don't look back it's good and then at some point down the road success meets opportunity right it's one of those things where I have planned we even put like this moment I've shot hundreds of blocks hundreds of times built all these things and it's like you don't know when that one time that one cuz I don't think it's one time to be frank right my intuition is it's getting into the pattern of asking for what you're looking for but being okay with not getting it and will you give right giving means you have no expectation on the other side manipulating is when you give with the thought you're gonna get and what people that love people that give don't understand is it's our natural DNA the end well you but winning comes in a lot of shapes and forms I'll be very frank with you if I do not buy the New York Jets I would have won because winning for me is the chase of the New York Jets I've already won you always say the journey hundred percent like people don't want to hear it I'll get booed when I'm 90 for not doing it did you care of course not because that's winning for me and winning you know spouses especially is a real tricky one it's of all the ones it's the trickiest one because they love you the most most hide into you so I have a lot of empathy for the men and women who have a spouse who's on the Gib train you know you have to define winning if you've been giving this whole time with the hope that some she drops I have a ton of empathy for that but you have to frame that in your head well then you've won but you have to ask yourself and it's okay if you've been hoping that it leads that's so unbelievably ok just as okay somebody who always take everything's ok you first have to ask yourself which one is it for me I will never let anybody have leverage on that is my happiness I get it I think deciding that winning is if your hope is that you all this giving leads to business opportunities that's great I believe I wrote a book called Jab right hook I believe that that's how it does work but only in the macro I will never give to her with the expectation that she delivers for me of something I need I'll be comfortable to ask I won't be disappointed if like I've had I've told some stories unbelievable I've given ask for something a tenth of it person didn't deliver but you know look there's that initial like you know like talk and then you're like and then just like I don't have a capability of dwelling so I think the question becomes for you what is winning for me no question I'm about statues and how many people show up to my people it's very clear to me and so to me that matters like I want to stun my grandkids of how many people who decide to show up like that will the greatest day of my life will be the first day I don't see it you know I know that and so as if you imagine just giving is that leverage but if you're looking for some short-term financial reward that's super acceptable what you need to make the change up is being clear about that because the cliched thing I see in other givers is they love the altruism that they give but they have a burning resentment and anger or fear inside that they're not getting of course I'll tell you why cuz you didn't ask for it upfront or set the framework for the potential of an upfront which makes sense right you see where I'm going that makes sense because if you didn't do it now you know you're sandbag and the person that makes you feel bad as it should I love that about you on a quick read what you want to think about is that macro work leading to opportunity because somebody's word of mouth or do you set it up in the beginning be like hey brother I'll give you one video but then I want you to buy one video and that's great and would you like that or no and that's up to you yep and by the way you've gotten without even knowing for that giving in many different ways the question becomes a what's the difference between you winning from your eyes versus your wife's eyes but it starts with you because your wife is taking pillow talk and random conversations and making in her own I know I gotta go right uh you know what I mean it's super important and here's the best part about forty nine you're a [ __ ] halftime yes and it's really hard to know that because when you're twenty two forty nine feels finished but when you're think about how young we all feel I wish he knew that we feel the same as him how are you chase how are you all right a couple days ago what 24 doesn't know is when you're double D H you feel exactly the same inside exactly the same you guys feel exactly the [ __ ] same that's right it's the same [ __ ] everything 49 years old sometime yeah just gotta ask upfront you know what I mean like I'm like hey I want to sell sneakers I'm like if you buy and you see how I do it and if you buy sneakers then I'd like you to buy them but you don't have to and you're more than welcome to continue to consume my content for free in perpetuity and as a matter of fact I'm so hungry to sell them I'm gonna give you a chance to get what you really want which is access

why don't you ask him how long do you have to do it for free no it says listen like listen I'll be honest with you I'm almost sure about it as well because it is 100% my biggest vulnerability to it might be at different scales people may look at like all this but I've left so much on the table right like I owe nothing of why my brain AJ 150 percent of this when I had all the leverage like I've left so much and my great fear is resentment okay and that's what I keep telling her is that here's the thing I don't look back it's good and then at some point down the road success meets opportunity right it's one of those things where I have planned we even put like this moment I've shot hundreds of blocks hundreds of times built all these things and it's like you don't know when that one time that one cuz I don't think it's one time to be frank right my intuition is it's getting into the pattern of asking for what you're looking for but being okay with not getting it and will you give right giving means you have no expectation on the other side manipulating is when you give with the thought you're gonna get and what people that love people that give don't understand is it's our natural DNA the end well you but winning comes in a lot of shapes and forms I'll be very frank with you if I do not buy the New York Jets I would have won because winning for me is the chase of the New York Jets I've already won you always say the journey hundred percent like people don't want to hear it I'll get booed when I'm 90 for not doing it did you care of course not because that's winning for me and winning you know spouses especially is a real tricky one it's of all the ones it's the trickiest one because they love you the most most hide into you so I have a lot of empathy for the men and women who have a spouse who's on the Gib train you know you have to define winning if you've been giving this whole time with the hope that some she drops I have a ton of empathy for that but you have to frame that in your head well then you've won but you have to ask yourself and it's okay if you've been hoping that it leads that's so unbelievably ok just as okay somebody who always take everything's ok you first have to ask yourself which one is it for me I will never let anybody have leverage on that is my happiness I get it I think deciding that winning is if your hope is that you all this giving leads to business opportunities that's great I believe I wrote a book called Jab right hook I believe that that's how it does work but only in the macro I will never give to her with the expectation that she delivers for me of something I need I'll be comfortable to ask I won't be disappointed if like I've had I've told some stories unbelievable I've given ask for something a tenth of it person didn't deliver but you know look there's that initial like you know like talk and then you're like and then just like I don't have a capability of dwelling so I think the question becomes for you what is winning for me no question I'm about statues and how many people show up to my people it's very clear to me and so to me that matters like I want to stun my grandkids of how many people who decide to show up like that will the greatest day of my life will be the first day I don't see it you know I know that and so as if you imagine just giving is that leverage but if you're looking for some short-term financial reward that's super acceptable what you need to make the change up is being clear about that because the cliched thing I see in other givers is they love the altruism that they give but they have a burning resentment and anger or fear inside that they're not getting of course I'll tell you why cuz you didn't ask for it upfront or set the framework for the potential of an upfront which makes sense right you see where I'm going that makes sense because if you didn't do it now you know you're sandbag and the person that makes you feel bad as it should I love that about you on a quick read what you want to think about is that macro work leading to opportunity because somebody's word of mouth or do you set it up in the beginning be like hey brother I'll give you one video but then I want you to buy one video and that's great and would you like that or no and that's up to you yep and by the way you've gotten without even knowing for that giving in many different ways the question becomes a what's the difference between you winning from your eyes versus your wife's eyes but it starts with you because your wife is taking pillow talk and random conversations and making in her own I know I gotta go right uh you know what I mean it's super important and here's the best part about forty nine you're a [ __ ] halftime yes and it's really hard to know that because when you're twenty two forty nine feels finished but when you're think about how young we all feel I wish he knew that we feel the same as him how are you chase how are you all right a couple days ago what 24 doesn't know is when you're double D H you feel exactly the same inside exactly the same you guys feel exactly the [ __ ] same that's right it's the same [ __ ] everything 49 years old sometime yeah just gotta ask upfront you know what I mean like I'm like hey I want to sell sneakers I'm like if you buy and you see how I do it and if you buy sneakers then I'd like you to buy them but you don't have to and you're more than welcome to continue to consume my content for free in perpetuity and as a matter of fact I'm so hungry to sell them I'm gonna give you a chance to get what you really want which is access