How to Grow a Family Business | Gary Vaynerchuk Original Film

who turned you into this guy did something to America and my mother you know I was born in the Soviet Union I didn't come up with much so adversity America my mom and my dad because when I was 14 and started working my dad's liquor store for 2 bucks an hour I was so full of [ __ ] and he sucked it out of me over 10 years because he hates lying and [ __ ] and so he scared me I was scared to embellish let alone lie I don't get upset when people like you know this guy's full of [ __ ] yeah because I'm like I understand I actually had that in me but my dad systematically took it out and I think it comes from lack of entitlement I turned 14 and by being the oldest son in an immigrant family my dad dragged me into the store small store in Springfield New Jersey shoppers discount liquors I went from making $2,000 a weekend looking cool to the ladies with all my cash to being paid two bucks an hour to bag ice and my dad's liquor store for ten hours a day and more importantly I wasn't allowed to leave the basement I was truly like sloth from Hades you know I was like hey you've got terrible hated it used to cry going to work for the first year and a half finally when I was like 16 my dad let me leave the basement so I went upstairs to dust bottles and in 1998 I took over to the family business and from 1998 to 2005 I grew the revenue of Wine Library from a three to a sixty million dollar a year business I had a burning desire to pay back my parents for being the best I was passionate like just obsessed with building my family business for them because they had put me on so much emotionally not you know people always say you know when people like the resume they're like easy for you to say you were given a liquor store I wasn't I built a business for my family and left with no economics because emotion my parents perfectly parented me which has now been the foundation of all my success there's only one way for to win a family business radical candor and you know how easy that is in a family business almost impossible so I'm giving you advice that's hard radical candor you're just gonna lose it's gonna eat you inside and I've good news for you this is the only chance to have a good relationship with them not the other way around you think you're doing the right thing to have a good relationship with them you're leading through things that's gonna make you have regrets and real issues with them and you're gonna snap and you guys are never bad second third generation family business people pay the biggest tax in the world and when they're [ __ ] talented they really are [ __ ] you know what family business dynamics are good for users that's when you're lucky when you suck [ __ ] and you're the one benefiting you know when family businesses suck when you're a winner and you're paying a tax nobody's ever paid in life it wasn't about how many impressions you got or how many awards you want and [ __ ] can it was about if we didn't sell [ __ ] Pinot Noir we weren't gonna eat right so it was results-driven my dad and I for all the things we agreed on disagreed on thank God we loved each other just enough more than we love the business which allowed us to keep a relationship but 99% of our energy was always about the business for the long term you know it's easy for everybody from the outside saying yo bro stop carrying your sister and your uncle and everybody's gettin money off your back if it makes you feel good and you're okay with 15 cents in a dollar or 50 cents of dollar well then that's your life so I would say this if you've got a problem with it and your friends are saying that because they're supporting what you're saying after four beers that's one thing but if they're just observing from the outside and they're starting to change your mind I wouldn't let outside sources tell you what to do with inside a family dynamic at the end of the day if you are the parent in the situation of a family business or if you are the child in the situation of a family business you have to deeply understand that when both of you are done and finished nobody's gonna count how many zeros they have in the bank account they're gonna count how many hearts and vibes and loves are in the system my dad and my brother and I were capable of doing was loving each other just a little bit more than the business making some more money or the ego or insecurities scratches that we needed in the dynamic of our relationships if there's anything that this film could get across to you I hope it is that at the end of the day on that last breath ask yourself what you're gonna be really thinking about