My Thoughts on Parenting and the Current School System | Bestsellers Podcast | DailyVee 385

there is something serious about this podcast I did the other day if you've not sat down and seriously looked at my content a little while or if you're somebody super deep into my content an incredible job here in this podcast going in a little bit of a different direction about me and my mindset I'm funny feeling when I read the comments that this will be really talked about and really analyzed I hope you enjoy it I'm very excited about it sit down grab a cup of eggnog and enjoy a lot of people try to D train attention through social media and making a business of it so what can be better than to talk to an expert on the subject welcome to this podcast Gary Vaynerchuk how are you I'm amazing fine good thanks for having me listen how does one become an expert on a thing that is still growing and people still try to figure it out I mean social media by being a practitioner you know there was a day when painting was new and the people that became good at it were the ones that were painting it's amazing to me how many people have opinions about Facebook or Instagram or LinkedIn or making videos or doing this kind of podcast and getting people to listen to it a whole lot of people with opinions who've never done it and so I believe the great way to be great at anything is to be a practitioner you know it's kind of people ask me all the time I make the analogy you know you can read about push-ups but if you want the results that push-ups give you have to do the push-ups and I just think a lot of people with business entrepreneurship and specifically being a social media content creator or a modern media digital creator read a lot talk a lot to pontificate a lot and don't do a lot the way I figured out how to have my podcast my YouTube show the way I figured out everything I do is by doing and you're gonna get some bumps and you're gonna make some mistakes I think most people don't do because they're worried about what other people think what kind of generation are we talking about everybody you know I think everybody I think I don't think this is as generational as people think I think this is more psychology than it is you know none of the four people sitting in this room right well the baboon's younger but the three of it and you're pretty held real good yeah talking to our sound engineer that's right I bring everybody into these podcasts I like to break the walls and visualize for you everybody who's listening look the three of us didn't like 35 okay look you know it's not about how old you I'm 42 and I feel more curious and more understanding of the culture in the game than plenty of people that are 18 I think it's a mindset and so it's a very interesting time to be alive there's so much opportunity and I'm excited to be a part of it but you are a very how do you say special thing is that you have this psychological skill that a lot of people come to you with a lot of problems and they try to get advices from you and you just give them advices how what kind of skill is - yeah that's psychiatrist that's you know psychologist that's right you know if I was a if I was the son of me instead of me I would have probably went to a top-five university and been a big-time psychiatrist or psychologist like a hundred percent because I was born an immigrant in a different environment and probably had a little bit too much you know competitive entrepreneurial DNA but yeah I think it's interesting as my life evolves that some of my natural skills are becoming more clear and it's less about being a Salesman for being good at digital marketing I'm very comfortable giving advice because I think I'm under educated and I keep things very simple like human behavior comes very natural to me which is why I've been very good at predicting what people are gonna do next it's also the same skill that allows me to know that most of people's issues come from their parents or the environment they were born in most things are very simple we don't want to look them in the face you know Facebook's not changing us Facebook's not making us bad people Facebook's exposing that we were bad to begin with you know like these are funny things to me they're historical I'm a big fan of history it was one class I was actually decent at and I think that's another thing that's worked well for me this is just rinse and repeat you know what's happening right now on Facebook and Twitter is the same reason that governments when they want to be dictatorships control the media because the media controls the mindset and so

you know I uh I think my skill is human behavior and I think my vice or my intrigued on another part of my life is building businesses and I think that's what me you know I bought Bitcoin in 2014 not because I guessed not because of anything else but because I could see what was gonna happen in 17 and 18 and yeah I think you know I make the joke earlier about special but I do feel special and I don't say that with ego I say that as a compliment to my parents and to my circumstance and to America and to the Soviet Union for that matter the circumstances of who I became are far more the factor than me but I do see around corners and not because I'm Nostradamus but because I deeply am consumer centric i watch what people wear when haircuts change I'm fascinated by that you know when fashion I be been great in fashion I would have been if I had that gene like my daughter is very creative and I can see she has a lot of me in her I can see her being a big-time fashion player in the future because if she deploys her creativity to fashion and she can see around corners she'll be an innovator of style and so yeah things are very simple to me but social media and and the human brain goes hand-in-hand I mean the human ecology and human brain goes hand-in-hand with everything social media is very important because it's communication you and I right now are sitting in some room at some conference this amazingly handsome talented sound engineer has a very small device doesn't look so complicated to me I wouldn't know what to do with it but it's not big hears and I know that this whole enterprise here is not costing a whole lot to create and distribute if you guys know what you're doing and I doesn't cost me a lot to distribute on my podcast which is a top 50 podcast in the world that whole enterprise used to cost millions of dollars in studio costs in distribution it's we're living in the internet age why don't people get this more and foster I mean because people look backwards instead of looking forward 90% of people default into looking behind them instead of looking ahead of them it's the human psyche I think most people are scared of change and they look for negatives there's people that are trying to blame suicide rates on social media it's laughable the issue with suicide rates in the world is bad parenting and many other variables and maybe social media but - by narrowly blame a media is silly and so I think when I look at what happens so I think there's a lot of Technology fear-mongering one thing I like to say a lot is that we put writing a letter on a pedestal but kids that are texting are bad I think that's crazy the message is important not the thing that delivers it you invested as you said before you knew about Facebook before Facebook was big and invested in facebook twitter tumblr uber and you are a rich son of a gun yeah but how can you inspire your kids I mean you had a total different I can't inspire in the way that I was inspired you know when I would stay at too much a hundred percent and they have other things they have a father who's gonna end up being famous and that might be good or bad first the way I'm gonna inspire my kids is to first do what I always do which is audit who they are not who I hope they are I first have to deploy self-awareness and empathy and understand who they are so for my daughter who's eight I'm starting to get a understanding and then three or four or five years I think I'm gonna have a very good understanding I'm gonna inspire my two children and what I try to inspire everybody who's listening to this is I don't want them to become me I only want one thing for people that I have really outside of health the only thing I wish for people is them to love what they do as much as I do when I do new podcasts or new video shows I love reading the comments of the audience that don't know me inevitably 5% of the audience will leave a comment that refers to drugs if they want to be really snarky they'll say I you know cocaine ritalin you know they think that I'm on something and I always reply because I've never tried smoking a cigarette let alone done adderall I

reply with grat the aunt so they'll say cocaine and I'll reply gratitude I'm so grateful that I do what I love everyday and what I love for clarification is just being an entrepreneur playing the challenges the risk the excitement but you're also high on your own energy you have tremendous energy I have tremendous energy because it builds momentum when you're doing what you want to be doing for a long period of time it builds momentum I didn't have the same energy in school I hated school I was optimistic I was high-energy that's my DNA but not like this is now a supernova because now I'm 20 years into in my zone the breath of fresh air the exhale I had on the first day that I worked at my dad's liquor store like worked like there was no more school ever again that was incredible that is a I will never replicate that feeling again I miss that feeling it's funny I've never talked about this out loud that would have been the best day of my life in a lot of ways knowing that I was embarking on the thing that I was meant to do so if my children want to give away all my money want to paint in the Himalayas want to start a school want to or want to climb the mountain and be bigger than me I just want to inspire them to be themselves and support them mentally but shouldn't q that didn't like the school system at all shouldn't you be the one to start the school mm-hmm I sure shed and I will call me you got it and by the way I think I am and this is and I've always dreamed of starting a school because I wanted to [ __ ] stick it back to them so that we could build a school for people like me what's interesting is I'm realizing I'm doing it now I have an enormous amount of 10 to 15 year olds following me across YouTube and Instagram and I'm teaching that boy you know maybe I'm not teaching them the way that people think teaching is done but I am teaching them and I see it and oh I have a great story I was flying yesterday from Gothenburg to Stockholm and I sat with a man whose 18 year old son is obsessed with me he lives in New Jersey of all places small world and he said that I made of so he's telling me he's you know he's telling me everything and I'm very flattered and he's a young man that his father he's 44 I'm 42 but he has an 18 year old son and he says my son you know I was a good student the father saying my son wasn't as good but he wants to be an entrepreneur and he every day he lives at home still and every day I walk to work come home anytime I'm going by him when he's out and not in his room and working on the kitchen or living room I hear your voice and then he turned to me very emotionally and he said thank you and it it's kind of making me a little bit emotional right now he said my son is such a better man now because of you and he's and then he started telling me reasons accountability you know I'm teaching real stuff not memorizing who the fourth president was and then he talked about me talking about my father and he says that his son is very competitive with him and I was very competitive my father but I put out some content about how I think about my dad even though we're different even there's a lot of don't agree with and he said to me that his relationship with his son has fundamentally changed since then what do you say to this youngsters that make such an impact to those who are listening and maybe haven't know yet I tell the truth I tell them the truth their parents are telling school isn't I tell them a lot of things they'd like to hear like [ __ ] the system forget about what your parents want for you this is your life do not live with regret and then I tell them other truths they don't like which is your [ __ ] entitled you haven't proven [ __ ] stop being full of [ __ ] like life is long be kind nobody gives a [ __ ] if you have a Mercedes or a Rolex shut the [ __ ] up get to work I tell them the truth okay you're right anyway and you know what let's hold on to that second for a second because it could be very valuable for your listeners I'm fascinated by what you just did to what I just said and how that plays out in my entire life when I go to can for the marketing festival and I go onstage and I talk about stuff nobody agrees with me in the industry but then at two o'clock in the morning they'll say to me after a couple of cocktails you're right when parents hear my stuff and they're and they're smart they don't like a lot of what I say but they'll tell me you're right you just did it what I'm trying to figure out is what makes one do something that

they know isn't right when they know what's right what is creating that behavior what I think is happening is they're worried about what other people think I have a lot of empathy for a 49 year old woman raising two teenagers in a neighborhood where she has a lot of friends where she believes in something but she doesn't do it because she doesn't want the scrutiny from the other moms I understand I just don't know why she's choosing herself over her children I think about that stuff I don't want my kids to be entrepreneurs too many people think of their children as property and as indicators of who they are and I understand that I get so proud when my kids do things I get it I just don't think it's in the best interest of the kids and so I'm trying to have conversations that a lot of people aren't it I just said that for the last three minutes because I hope somebody on my blog or somebody in your podcast one if one parent just got inspired in the last five minutes those kids lives are much better for everything you know what of it you know how incredible that is that's what media is that's the world we live in today I would have never been known but the thing you say get your [ __ ] together yes I recognize that I'm a daughter of immigrants as well so we hear that a lot and I'm saying that immigrants are the best people on earth because we create a lot of good teenagers but there is something when you have a new person you have to fight it to fight my kids can't be as hungry as me I think the challenge that you and I have as you know kids of immigrants and I'm an immigrant myself some real close to it is I'm ideological about the immigrant framework I'm with you like even like we know how lucky we are we're like because we're hungry or we were we know what [ __ ] you know it's good it's better entitlement and prosperity has flaws on the back end but I think the mistake a lot of people make is they try to fabricate the reality of the situation I see a lot of my rich friends send their kids to Africa for two days and think it's gonna change them I think what's better is my recommendation for anybody who's listening who thinks that their kids are in a situation that is spoiled or entitled or fruitful you know my big thing is I can't fake environment my kids live on the Upper East Side in Manhattan go to private schools have friends who have private planes I myself you know my daughter and son go with me the other day to buy I want to go buy jeans and buy them some candy I took 11 selfies right I could choose to be rude to people and say I'm with my family but that's not in me so I chose to do that but that's affecting my children you know my daughter's like you're famous you're a legend and you know I can't fake their life but there is something I think that you where you're going that I think is super important I do think some things are non-negotiable so my rig my kids are gonna be rich and they're gonna be spoiled they're not gonna be as hungry as me when I was 12 I asked my mom to buy Nintendo she said go buy it I figured it out I could do that to my kids but there's too much surrounding the framework of our family that that's not where I'm gonna go but where I am gonna go is the following so for example something that is very politically incorrect is to hit your children right not a big thing that we do anymore I'm very comfortable saying on the record I will hit my child if they ever use my and my wife's wealth to be rude to another child if my kids ever once in their life make another kid feel bad cuz me and Lizzy are rich and they're using that to make somebody else feel bad I will punch them in the face I hope they hear that yo kids you know what's even better it's better than hearing it whether they listen to this podcast or the clip and if they use it if they ever hear it it's gonna matter a lot less than the fact that it is our religion inside our home they they've heard it it's been heard they don't even know it yet but it's established and I think you know kindness and being kind is non-negotiable I don't need them to be as hungry as I am cuz they're not going to be I need them to be kind and figure out who they are and then I need them to go all in if they are equally if they make paintings out of asparagus and make eight dollars a year I will be very proud as long as they have as much fire in their eye the way I do about my thing my fire turned into wealth I get it but there's a lot of people who have fire who do much greater things than create wealth I will tell you I have much more fire to inspire people and make them win than my own my personal wealth once I made a hundred thousand dollars a year I thought I was rich that was big I was

pumped I'm still pumped a hundred thousand I can live very good right now this house is big yes I agree and and so I don't like stuff like I don't need money for anything I don't I so if my kids become you know lecturers you know but only make seventy three thousand a year there they're gonna make me very proud as long as they're fired or not been happy let's continue talk about young people but also business-wise okay there are a lot of examples of brands that are panicking believing that they are facing their final days they buy consultants to analyze the social media and they still fail to reach out to Millennia's Millennials for example and I think just to take an example I think only one of five Millennials has tried to Bing back from the tunnels yeah Big Mac yeah yes and I mean it doesn't matter how much social media they try to expose themselves in it doesn't work so then McDonald's started - well it doesn't this work so why what do you say well let's start with this if Boehner media did the marketing for McDonald's and they gave me carte blanche five out of five Millennials would try the Big Mac I'm not joking and I think I can get every [ __ ] person in America including vegan moms to eat a [ __ ] Big Mac I don't think that you know I don't think big McDonald's big problem is the food trends because they sell plenty of salads and they've got all sorts of reasons I think it's the marketing I really do Donald's spends 80 percent of its money ninety on traditional or traditional digital their mailing in their modern contemporary culturally relevant content in the seven places that Millennials play their mailing it in they spent but this is a point yes but some other economists say that Millennials don't buy it don't trust anyone everyone won't meanwhile Millennials are wearing adidas and vans and champion hoodies Millennials buy plenty under buying smart water like Millennials are [ __ ] people I can trick a millennial to do anything I want how's your doctor trick them by making things that are valuable to them you know how I trick them by giving them what they want by not giving them what I want by being consumer centric by listening to Millennials will tell you what they want you're just not listening you know why because older generations have too much audacity I can get a millennial to do anything I want because I'm deploying humility and I'm listening that's why social media yes also borders yes and you live in the u. s. how can you use this fact of two cultures this is wise I mean we have to leave out you know if I want to be a big personal brand in Moscow I have more autonomy to do that I do in New Delhi or in San Paulo so one I think everybody's truth is very important you know one of the reasons I think I do very well in urban and hip-hop worlds is because I liked it as a kid because I spent a lot of time with a lot of minorities because 90% of the kids in my college or minority and so I think that what's amazing is if you're willing to embrace your truth there's an enormous amount of strength in that so for example there's a lot of people listening right now with diseases that they will never tell anybody usually mental right I'm very fascinated by what's happening with you know meditation mental illness you know if you're bipolar twelve years ago you're hiding it I think you need to expose it and so I think borders are not just you know our ancestors and where we're born but I think it's what you know what makes us I mean you know I think that there's so much more that we should be talking about and taking control of it I very early on talked about being a bad student when it wasn't that popular I cursed on content in the early and mid 2000s when that was not popular but it was my truth I curse I'm a bad student and there's something very powerful about truths so when I think about crossing borders if it's your truth you can be unbelievably successful I also think of just as very tactical I think it's an incredible time to get bigger in other places if you're willing to transcribe your content

I'm transcribing my content into different languages and watching my popularity grow in Italy and Asia and in spanish-speaking countries it's very fascinating to see Facebook is such an incredible tool yeah I mean I think of the world is one world I do think that Soviet succeed in that so I think Russia and I do think China have some different variables because of their structure China's a big mark in itself it's got its own insular culture I think Russia it does the same but other than that I think of the world is a 1 and Facebook helps us with that 100% how much time does consume spent time with Facebook no I don't know what the updated figure is but here's what I can tell you almost 50% of time over 50% of times spent on a mobile device in the world is being spent on a social network and Facebook has a disproportionate amount of that time so just ungodly hours an hour when you take it I mean look in today as we record this if you add up the attention time that is spent in Facebook and Instagram combined it's extraordinary the power of that to how much power does what costs have a lot I think audio is the next frontier because it's passive consumption and time is very important so I'm very bullish on podcasts Alexa and Google home and you know devices that interact with youth and voice I'm betting the farm on voice being the next frontier well who's inspiring you that's it this is in question I am I'm not sure so let me answer this honestly that's a good you know I'm inspired by everybody and nobody if you want to be honest right I'm I've never been framed up as somebody who looked up or admired people you know outside of my parents and really even in silos like my mom is a parent er and as a human being she gives advice everybody to just in a much smaller circle than I did so I grew up watching that or to your earlier question and my mom said very much my hero my dad from the work ethic you know the hustle thing that I talk about but it's interesting I I'm my wife for her inability to complain there's a lot of people and then and then you know just silly stuff like let's use Bab and he's in the room watching Tyler work for me for a year knowing from day one he came to work for a year use my name and then go out and do his own thing I knew it and didn't to watch him be able to recognize the situation and realize it was valuable for him to stay I'm inspired by that now maybe that's me humble bragging and being look how good I am that's fine the millions of emails DMS and messages I get I mean listen I get an email and a DM on Instagram every day that is from somebody that's homeless 10 times a day 20 times a day from a single mother in a really shitty situation 30 times a day from somebody in a mental negative state do you answer well no I wish [ __ ] man that France frustrated to have so many cries for help yeah no because I'm practical I'm driven and inspired to be a good man because I think people are counting on me to be and I like the challenge I like the pressure I like it's what I'm comfortable with it's Who I am you know Gary you should listen to my podcast okay I will thank you for coming thanks for having me on this episode this podcast I did what was the most interesting insight you hadn't heard before in this episode