Haters: Why we love them & then ignore them

- On this episode, I get really deep on that last question. Don't fast forward! (upbeat hip hop music) - [Gary] You ask questions, and I answer them. This is The #AskGaryVee Show. Hey everybody, this is Gary Vay-ner-chuk and this episode 201 of The #AskGaryVee Show. Alright, we're in to the 200s. Monday morning, feeling good about that. DRock doing some snaps over here. We're taping a DailyVee today. - [DRock] Yeah. - [Gary] Which I'm very excited about. You're not filming right now. 'Cause we got this, right? If you want to take a quick little sample, you'll do that. India, great to see you. Is that a San Francisco Giants? - [Staphon] I told you. - What? You guys were debating about that? - [India] I was like, "Should I wear it? " - That's really cool, I like it. - [Staphon] She was like "He won't notice. " I was like, "Yes, he will. " - I noticed. India, are you ready for the show? - I'm ready for the - [Both] Show. - Call in show was a lot of fun. I enjoyed that, I want to do that. I think we have some things to figure out. Andy! I really wish this was a call in show but I feel like we didn't have time to talk about the kinks. - Yeah. - I feel like there's kinks. - For the call in? Yeah, we'll work them out. It'll be easy. - But I think 202 or 203 I want to do it so I want to address kinks. - Okay. - Alright. So we are now into the next frontier episode 200 to 300. You know, I'm really curious how long I'm actually going to do this. I don't feel it wavering, don't worry. But I do think, I would say I was positive I'd get to 200 I'm not positive I get to 300. I can see us doing something weird and being at 267 being like that's it. I really do believe that. Alright. - [India] 267? - 267, we'll all be watching that. (laughter) Alright, India, let's get into the show.

- [Voiceover] The Wealth Life asks, "How do you deal with people who don't keep their word? " - Wealth, I'll be very honest with you I think one of the great secrets of my business success and life in general is zero expectation of others. I know that a lot of people get mad at me when I say that in my life, in my business life, when I say it in public but it's my truth. I'm just not that devastated. It's a data point. People don't keep their word all the time, India. As a matter of fact, it's probably a thing I struggle with the most in being the CEO of this company. A lot of people have worked in other places where the person hasn't kept their word and they're cynical to my word. And listen, by the way, I haven't kept my word my whole life. Even now because something may fall through the inbox. Like, you see what's going on now. Right? I know that I promised to give a shoutout or a birthday wish and I miss it. There's human error in not keeping your word and then there's just which happens often. It's a reality, humans are flawed. And I would tell you that the biggest differentiation between myself and many others if I'm self-evaluating that has been a big deal for me is I just don't cry. There's no crying in business. How do I deal with it? I move on. I collect data. I'm like, "Oh, Staphon doesn't keep his word very often "so his word is not as valuable to me so I'm going "to take it with a grain of salt "that he's going to actually link this up. " Whatever it may be, I think it's something that you know, I don't like entitlement. And I do think believe it or not, I do think that people get upset with others from a level of entitlement more than anything else. Like sorry, Rick. Sorry, Wealth Wellness, Wealth Life sorry that entrepreneur life let you down and didn't post that thing. It is what it is. I just let stuff roll off my back. I'm just prepared for the negative and so I'm completely unfazed by it. I'm like, "Oh, that was intriguing. " Not like, "Oh, screwed me. I've been sabotaged. "I failed because India didn't come through with her word. " "Ogilvy screwed me. " It's business. Put on your pants. Your big boy, big girl pants and get to work. I contextualize it. I use it as a data set for my next business behavior with that individual or organization and I just move on. And, I don't dwell and I go forward. People slow themselves down. - [India] Ready? It's good. Really good. - Thanks, it's true. It's the game, I'm sorry. People are going to let you down. People are not going to come through. Almost nothing turns out the way I want it to. It's the ability to adjust to that separates winners and losers in the business world. - [India] From Justin. - Justin. Timberlake? - Yes. Justin Timberlake. - This is Justin Timberlake? - No. - [Gary] Bieber? - [India] It's whatever Justin you want it to be right now. - Okay. - [India] Bieber or Timberlake. - Neither. I'll tell you later. - [India] - Novello. (laughter)

- [Voiceover] Justin asks, "If you were building a retail "biz from the ground up, what trend would you "be paying the most attention to? " - Justin, this is a silly question. What do you mean "what trend"? All of them. How people are shopping on mobile, how bricks and mortors are still very viable. Health and wellness, meditation, technology. There's no one trend to pay attention to. I'm not going to give you, there's no secret. There's no episode 201 maybe Gary will answer my question and give me some incredible insight. They're all in play. All the trends matter, mobile commerce, people shopping behaviors, real time delivery and then all the genres of things you could be selling, right? Just a million things that people are in to like tea and yoga pants and I don't know. This question is kind of exhausting and I'm not mad at you, Justin Novello, it's just it's a silly question because they all matter. I pay attention to everything I can as much as possible, Justin. As many things as possible. They're all data sets, they all can lead to opportunity. You know, that's what I would pay attention to. There's a million things going on. There are 75 different pillar, core things that are going on in retail. The lack of people traveling to malls. Postmates same-day delivery. Downtowns and cities emerging again and the gentrification of neighborhoods. Fashion trends. What people are drinking and eating. Sneaker swag. Accessories on cell phones. Everything that's happening in Asia that one out of every seven times happens in the US. Like, I don't know, all of it.

- [Voiceover] Melita asks, "If we aren't good with numbers, "can we really be good at business? " - I'm shit with numbers. Next. - [India] Perfect. From Andy. - [India] a video. - I'm not that shit with numbers but I'm very average.

- What's up, Gary? This is Andy_Barton. Staphon, link it up, here in the Teton in Wyoming. I know you say you don't want to climb that god damn mountain but how do you think nature effects your brain and do you take time to get outside? Thanks for everything. - Andy, great question. Beautiful setting. I do like videos. Good job, India for picking one, I do want more videos in beautiful places. Andy, this is one. Look, nature is not at the forefront of it for me but I think a lot of people use it. I have a ton of entrepreneurial friends who rock climb, run marathons. I had a meeting this morning with Mark Evans that you'll see in DailyVee, he's running 40 races for his 40th birthday year. That's how he escapes. And that's how he keeps his mental health and I think nature is an incredible, incredible driver for so many. I'm so thankful for nature in many ways. Obviously, what it is in society but from a business stand point I've watched entrepreneur after entrepreneur really get enormous value from walking trails to surfing. It's incredible. It's not my thing, it's just not. I really don't care about pretty sunsets. I have no interest in ever going on a mountain trail. I have just none. Beautiful fields are not interesting to me. I would be like, "Oh, we could build homes here "and make money. " It's not who I am but that doesn't mean that it doesn't bring enormous value to people and I watch a lot of people here go to the mountains even a lot of people that work at Vayner love working in L. A. and San Franscisco 'cause they provide so much of that. I've watched the New York crew do the best they can in to the Upper Westchester or the Vermonts or the Maines or things of that nature. They're all probably getting pumped because we're getting that time of year where nature plays a little bit of a bigger role. So many get so much value, even look at the body language of these three, like it's awesome. iI's just not how I escape. I escape really in weird ways. I escape with the Jets. The Jets matter so much to me that's how I escape. And the truth is I work out, obviously, seven days a week now as you guys know. I'm doing a lot of that indoors. So I don't know. I'm just not drawn to nature. I've never been. Mother Nature and I have respect but not love.

- [India] Last one. - Yeah. - [Voiceover] "This is Vignesh. "I am 15 years old. "My question is whenever someone puts you down, "how do you push yourself back up? " - Vignesh, you know, it's tougher when you're 15 as you're building your self esteem and your foundation of your life. Listen, if you're 45 or 62, there are so many people right now that are not doing what they love because they're worried about what other people think or what other people say. Especially your inner family. We've talked about this at length. I'm very passionate about this. I'm so grateful I don't give a crap about what anybody thinks of me while equally caring. It's incredibly important to me what India or DRock or Staphon think of me. It's incredibly important. It's stunning though how anti-establishment or how much I would push back when they would try to impose their will on me. And that's a very important differentiation. Actually, that's one of the first time I've ever articulated this way and I like this. There's a very big difference between what one thinks of you and what one tries to do by imposing their way on you. I'm very open, empathetic and quite self-aware of what everybody thinks of me and pander to it, react to it and adjust to it but for somebody to try to impose their way on me without knowing me is just super not interesting. And so, I was able to navigate through junior high and high school and really not struggle with peer pressure. I just, very honestly, thought I was better than everybody. I didn't act that way. If you go find all the kids that went to high school with me I don't think any of them would say that I walked around like I was cooler than them. That would have been very hard as a 4 foot 11 freshman that was being made fun of for not being 5 foot. It's how I thought inside and I think there's a lot of intestinal fortitude to use a gorilla monsoon term, that's when wrestlers would beat up and they would fight like the Hulkster and Macho Man and Ultimate Warrior that was the whole kind of genre of the 80s, get beat the crap out of and then all of a sudden and so, that's kinda how I am. I can take a lot and then all of a sudden fight back. There's nothing other I can say than you're 15 now, when you're 51 or when you're 91 you're going to be stunned how little you care. How little it mattered and this includes your parents and your siblings and even your children. This is an intense thing, this is a very intense thing. But if I could wish anything besides health on people there's a lot. I say this saying a lot. There's a lot of traits I like. Self-awareness but man there's unbelievable happiness that comes along with self-belief and recognizing how this plays out. And let me tell you how this plays out, Prince as he was taking his last breath, as a big shout out to Prince, I'm a huge fan, I don't think Prince cared what Billboard Magazine said or what anybody said. It's just the way it is. It's the way it is so if through this plea on this show, on 201, on a Monday in late spring, if four of you to understand, if I could get understand it's just not going to matter when people I mean... I love when people... I don't even know what else to tell you. I'm going to say it very clear. Staphon get very focused here because I want to really deliver this with all the drama that it deserves. I like when people put me down. I get off on Nothing is more interesting to me than to prove all of you wrong. I love the people that think I'm a huckster or I got some hidden agenda or I'm not that good or I won't be that great or I think too big of myself or my dad had a liquor store and that's the only reason I'm successful or I got lucky or da-da-da-da-da-da-da. Show me. Please, please continue to judge me and underestimate me because it's the only driver I have and that's how I'm wired. And I don't expect all of you to be wired that way but if I can through my energy move any of you and trust me I'm reading your comments 'cause your comments are my oxygen and I see so many of you. So many comments over the last three or four months of people saying I've got a little more cockiness or confidence than I used to. As a matter of fact, I see it in you guys. I truly see my inner circle have more confidence, it just rubs off. India, you're getting cocky. - [India] I probably am. - [Gary] Have you felt it? - Yeah. - [Gary] Yeah. - I think it's confidence. - [Gary] I know, I know. But it's true, right? There's a rub off. It's kind of like a leader on a sports team. It rubs off. One of the great accomplishments in my life will be the fact that I was able to rub off my confidence not only on my inner circle but on the community that decided to. It's unbelievable how good I feel that I get to reward the amazing reward that you give me which is in all the things you could be watching right now you're watching this. In all the things you could be reading, spending time on, time, you've decided to watch me. Me! Do you know how incredibly empowering that is and it's at scale? It's not three people. Do you know how empowering that is? And for me not only knowing I can give you tactical advice or in a funny way that I answer question number three a girl in Indonesia might say if GaryVee is bad at math and has been successful I can too. Or in this ending rant you can care a little bit less what your coworker or your older brother or that naysayer says or what I know so many of you deal with which is the trolling and the hate and the disagreeing even when it's done well and I love when people disagree with me in the comments section I take it for what it is. Even when that happens... You know how pissed I was at DailyVee 030? How many people like were emphatically were drilling me for a bad episode? Fine but after all that and that's fine and I agree and we didn't do a good job setting that up and I don't think I set up DRock for success. It's a genre that he's not as passionate about. I could have done a better job. I understand that but it blows me away of how much venom people can put like after you provided... You're only as good as your last at-bat. 200 great episodes of a business show, 30 docu show, 5,000 fucking interview of business stuff, unbelievable engagement, answering your questions, answering your snaps. Boom, one baseball fantasy thing pure and utter disagreement, disparagement, hate, negativity, that's hard. I'm the most confident and it felt bad and I didn't like it. So what do I expect from others? I get it but it is what it is and at the end of the day it's not gonna matter and you have to love yourself first and feel good and complete with yourself first so as a 15 year old I would do what I did as a 15 year old which is start building those skills and not listen to your parents teachers and not listen to your friends. Respect it but don't let anybody, anybody impose their way on you. It's you. You're with yourself and you've got to make yourself happy first. Good, right? - [India] Inspiring. - You're inspired? - [India] Mhmmm. Thanks, India. DRock, were you inspired? - Eh. - [Gary] You're so used to it? - I'm just kidding. Definitely. - Real cynical, right? See what happens. - [Staphon] Confidence. That's what it is. - No, it wasn't confidence. You see what he just did? He just did exactly what I said. Right, you two are switching. Alright, great. That's it, right? Question of the day. What should I ask? What are you, you guys interested in anything? India are you interested? Actually, India, you and DRock get to ask the question of the day I'm not passionate about it. Start with DRock. - [Gary] Alright, tough guy. (laughter) - [India] Mine's a stupid question. - [Gary] It's alright you got a lot of time to think. - What was your favorite episode of DailyVee? Why? - [Gary] Ooh. And why? That's a good one because DRock wants some qual data. India? - I want to know who your baseball team is and who you root for. - Alright. Awesome, you're in a baseball mood. Guys, thanks for watching 201, ooh 201 it's like the next grade. Isn't that how they do it in college? 101, like Econ 101, Econ 201. - [DRock] Yeah. - You keep asking questions, I'll keep answering them. (upbeat hip hop music)