Why This River Doesn’t Reach the Ocean

Rivers, you know them. They're the bit where water goes. Rivers do a pretty specific thing. Just look at their Wikipedia page. They flow, quote, on land or in caves towards another body of water at a lower elevation such as an ocean, lake, or another river. You make a good point, Wikipedia, but counterpoint, the Colorado River. It's like an absolute 10 out of 10 goated with the sauce mogger of a river. It's got the Grand Canyon, the Hoover Dam, just an absolutely elite specimen. But it breaks the river rules. You see, it starts here at La Poudre Pass Lake in Colorado and flows 1,370 mi or 2,200 km before simply un-rivering not into an ocean, not into a lake, not even into another river, Wikipedia, but into nothingness. But why? Why does this river so flagrantly break the river rules? — Well, it kind of goes back to the fact that it's an absolute 10 out of 10 goated with the sauce mogger of a river. You see, the region that it flows through, Colorado, Utah, Arizona, Nevada, California, Arizona, Mexico, and a bunch of tribal land, is really, really dry. The river is not. It's kind of the opposite of drying, and that's useful for all the people that say they need water to live or whatever. After its formation at 10,100 ft or 3,100 m above sea level, the first guy to take a sip is the city of Fort Collins, which is strange because Fort Collins is over here and the Continental Divide is here, and its Wikipedia page says it's the, quote, hydrological divide of the Americas and that rivers on the west side, quote, drain into the Pacific, and that ones on the east, quote, drain into the Gulf of Mexico, the Caribbean Sea, and the Hudson Bay. That means a river can't flow from this side to this side. That breaks the river rules. But luckily for its integrity in this case, it's not the Colorado's fault. It's this guy's because he and his neighbor built a tunnel to suck water from the wet bits of Colorado to the dry bits. Should they be allowed to do that? Kind of seems mean. A lot of people say, "Nah-uh. " But regardless, he does. Then the Colorado leaves the wet bits where there's all the snow that melts into the Colorado, unless this is the year 2026 and the snowpack is at the lowest level recorded in history, and oh damn, oh darn, that seems really bad, but I digress. The Colorado gets to the dry bits in Grand Junction. The city is like, "Yes, please. I'd like some. " and sucks up about 3% of the water for itself. It puts that into this canal, which goes into smaller canals, which go into ditches, which go into sprinklers that spring water around to make plants wet. That's how we get melons and stuff like that. Then the river goes more and mogs even harder for a minute in Canyonlands and the Grand Canyon, but then it gets to the area where rain just straight up does not precipitate good. But turns out humans like it when rain doesn't precipitate good because rain is a little bit annoying sometimes, and they can kind of just tune out the bit where they need water to live or whatever. Las Vegas is the first big city along the route, and it sucks water from Lake Mead, aka the Colorado River slowed down by the Hoover Dam. But Vegas is respectful and sucks just a little bit and has developed into one of the most water-efficient cities in the world and a model of urban water conservation for the fact that it returns almost 100% of indoor water back to the Colorado River, treated and cleaned to be used again downstream. But downstream is where things get really sucky, especially at Lake Havasu. This pipe sucks 8% of the water and sends it hundreds of miles across the desert to Los Angeles and San Diego, while this pipe swallows 11% and puts it in a canal that flows even further to Phoenix and Tucson. Not to be all dramatic or anything, but the entire city of Tucson plus half of Phoenix basically couldn't exist without this 100-ft 30-m wide canal. It is basically the fundamental piece of infrastructure for one of America's fastest-growing regions. It's kind of a big deal. But then eventually, after having encountered endless small and large diversions for urban, tribal, and agricultural use, the Colorado reaches its largest, this dam, which diverts 20% of its flow to feed the water supply of California's Imperial Valley, one of America's most important growing areas. If you nibbled at something green in winter in America, there's a very good chance it came from here. Then the Colorado gets to its last dam, sitting literally on the US-Mexico border, and just 10% of the water is left. This is left to flow over to Mexico as part of the US's neighborly Just kidding. It's mandated under the terms of a fiercely negotiated multilateral international agreement. Mexico and relevant US states sat down in 1922 and agreed to divvy up the 16 million acre-feet of annual flow between themselves until the Supreme Court said, "Guys, you split up literally all of it, but we'd already promised water to the tribes. " And also the river said, "Guys, you split up literally all of it, but I'm going to flow 13 million acre-feet due to the implications of mysterious unknowable forces that are making all of nature freak out at rates higher than ever recorded in the history of the universe. 16 million things being promised but only 13 million things being available does, in fact, turn out poorly. The parties are presently trying to renegotiate, but this is, in

addition, going poorly. But regardless, most of the time Mexico gets most of the water it's promised, and it immediately diverts all of it to its own canal that feeds its important winter growing area in the Mexicali Valley. If you do the math, subtracting all of the flows equals none, and that's why the Colorado River doesn't reach the ocean. Yes, the video script could have been, quote, "Because they use all of the water before it reaches the ocean. " But I kept you to this point and extracted revenue. Water does often pool beneath the dam, but this is minor and mostly stagnant, derived from dam leakage, agricultural runoff, and rain. Eventually, this dries up into truly nothing, and all that can be seen is the texture of where the river used to flow. Now, you might be thinking, quote, "Not to get all woke or whatever, but isn't this like really pretty devastating to the area's ecology? " You're right. Birds used to flock to the Colorado River Delta like boomers to Boca. It was the spot to pull over and eat bugs when migrating from Canada to Mexico. The fish were fans, too, as they got nutrients, which make them big and strong. Genuinely good news, though. They did an experiment in 2014 and found that the ecology actually was still capable of bouncing back. They started sending water downstream, and bugs started returning within days, birds within weeks, and plants within months. The ecosystem was repairing itself. Birds were singing, bugs were buzzing, the sun was shining, but then funding ran out and water stopped and all that went away. This was the last time they really did that because the water is busy sprinkling the 200 golf courses in the greater Phoenix area. So, the Colorado River is not really rivering right. It's kind of more of a water feature right now. So, I'll be referring to it henceforth as the Colorado Water Feature, and I welcome you to do the same. Now, I know you're thinking, "Damn, Sam, those are some sexy shots of the Colorado Water Feature you got there. I didn't know that rivers could make me feel this way. " To that I say, secondly, that's perfectly normal. You have nothing to worry about. And firstly, you're so right. We got them from our sponsor Storyblocks, and it's kind of crazy that they're sponsoring us because, legit, no joke, 10 years ago, the first dollars I ever invested into my YouTube channel when I was just starting out was getting a subscription to them back when they were called Videoblocks. Most high-quality stock imagery sites charge you per clip, which really adds up when you're working on YouTube budgets, but Storyblocks gives you unlimited access to their library for one subscription fee, helping keep costs under control. Better yet, they have far more than clips, photos, music, sound effects, Premiere and After Effects templates, and more. Basically, every asset you need to make high-quality digital content. Also, one thing I really appreciate these days is that all their assets are actually human-made, no AI slop. So, if you make stuff online, they're truly the best deal out there, especially right now, as they're offering you 15% off an annual plan when you use our link. So, click the link in the description and sign up for Storyblocks today.